


Can You Keep A Secret?

by justahotmess



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mob, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Cheating, Cunnilingus, Dominant Kylo Ren, F/M, Fluff, Infidelity, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Mob!Kylo, Secret Sex, Shameless Smut, Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:00:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 36,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25750027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justahotmess/pseuds/justahotmess
Summary: You hadn't thought after that night that you would have been back. But here you were, stood staring right at the man who had broken you heart, his fiancée clinging to his arm just like she had done that night.All of your feelings came flooding back, every kiss, every touch and every caress you shared flashed through your mind. You had to stop, had to stop thinking about him. He was engaged.And so were you.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You, Original Male Character(s)/You, Original Male Character/Reader
Comments: 34
Kudos: 154





	1. Chapter One

**Chapter One**

_**One Year Earlier** _

You stood admiring your reflection in the full length mirror in your bedroom, feeling the smooth silky emerald green fabric that wrapped around your body. You left leg was displayed by the split that run up the side. The wrap effect of the top portion of the dress highlighted your chest, while still covering you. It tied at the waist, allowing the material to flow behind you with every step you took.

It had been a gift from Kylo for your birthday, which had only taken place a month before.

“Wear this to the party,” he whispered in your ear, his breath tickling you as he spoke.

A month later, the party was here and there you stood in the dress Kylo had asked you to wear for him. Black strappy heeled sandals complimented the look and elongated your leg. The only downside, currently, was the fact Kylo wasn’t here. The last month had gone by in a blur, fixing everything together for the party that was finally bringing Kylo back home.

The past four years had been difficult, full of fighting between the First Order and the Resistance. It had been tiresome, so many people had been lost on both sides. But that was all over now. The death of Snoke had been a turning point for Kylo; all of Snoke’s lies, his manipulation, his deceit, all of that came to the surface. The son of the most formidable gangster in New York, no wonder Snoke wanted him.

Friends turned from him quickly the moment Snoke dug his claws into him. Poe, Finn, Rose, even Rey. But not you.

Never you.

You had stayed with him, ran away with him in the middle of the night. You had cut ties with you family; with everything you had known. All for him. It wasn’t a decision you had made half-heartedly. You knew what the outcomes would have been, but that didn’t matter. You had seen something in Snoke that Kylo hadn’t seen. You didn’t trust him. You ran away with him so you could protect him. Keep him from falling too deep into the nightmare that was Snoke.

You had kept him grounded. And when Kylo finally confided in you that he wanted a truce, that he missed his family and it was only now, now that he was free from Snoke’s influence that he realised that, it had been you that had called a treaty, a peace gathering between the two sides. You were Kylo’s right-hand woman; a skilled killer and a damn smooth talker, you could talk, flirt and bat your eyelashes out of anything.

You weren’t just his right hand woman; you were also his best friend, his confidante and his lover. No-one, apart from those closest to you and Kylo, knew that your relationship extended to more than just business partners. You had to maintain a façade, if people found out about your ‘relationship’, that was ammunition for anyone who wanted to take down Kylo.

You loved him, of course you did. How could you not? He was big, strong, _gorgeous_. Everything about him screamed ‘power’ from his height, his size, to his walk and the way he dressed. It had been so easy to fall in love with him. Not that you told him that.

You knew he was a complicated man, a man who felt he had never had love in his life. While you were there to willingly give it to him, you didn’t know whether you could handle the rejection if he didn’t love you back. It was only sex, Kylo had told you that after your first night together. You lied and said you knew that, obviously you had been hoping for something more.

But in this life, you can’t form too many close attachments. Sure, people got married, some even loved one another, like Han and Leia. But most of them? Most of them were marriages of convenience, to secure alliances and peace treaties between two rival gangs. You knew you had to stop being foolish, foolish to think that Kylo would even love someone.

Still, it didn’t make it any easier.

You shook your head of thoughts of Kylo Ren and plastered a smile on your face as you looked over your outfit once more. Even if Kylo didn’t love you, you knew he would appreciate you looking like a million dollars. Your hair was thrown up into an elegant updo, a few strands hanging down just to soften the look. A soft smokey eye and dark burgundy lip finished the look.

Giving yourself one final look over in the mirror, you turned and walked out of your room. You were in your own apartment, rather than in Kylo’s. The last month he had been distant, various meetings between him and his parents just to make sure this night would go smoothly. You understood, of course. It wasn’t easy going back to your parents, while still being the boss of a rival gang.

You checked the time on the clock that hung in your living room. 7:53. The car Kylo sent to get you would arrive any minute, so you decided to wait in the foyer of your apartment block, rather than sit and crease your dress.

As soon as you arrived in the foyer, you were greeted by Dopheld Mitaka, one of Kylo’s personal drivers. “Ah good evening, Dopheld,” you smiled brightly as you walked towards him.

“Good evening, ma’am.”

You gave him a pointed look. “How many times do I have to tell you to call me by my name?”

“Sorry,” he chuckled as he called you by your name. “Force of habit,” he said as he opened the back door of the sleek black car for you to get in. Offering his hand, you took it as he helped you get seated.

Settling into your seat, Dopheld shut the door and you sent a text to Kylo, letting him know you were on your way.

\-----

Half an hour later, you arrived at the grand estate of Han and Leia’s house. It had been so long since you were there, you had forgotten how enormous the house was.

Cars were filling in and out of the driveway, the faces of high profile people coming into your line of vision as the car inched closer and closer to the front steps of the house. Once in front of them, Dopheld escorted you out, taking your hand once again. You flashed him a smile and thanked him before making your way up the concrete stairs and through the open doors.

One things you hadn’t forgotten about the Solo’s, were the lavish parties that they held. The inside of the house hadn’t changed, the white marble floors were still as pristine as always, and the tall ceilings decorated in gorgeous gold ceiling roses. Today, the grand staircase in the foyer had been decorated in a red carpet, which trailed down the stairs and towards the back of the house where the ballroom was situated.

You felt everyone’s eyes on you, and you couldn’t blame them. You had been gone for just as long as Kylo, and now here you were, dressed to the nines and celebrating the fact that Kylo had returned. You made eye contact with as many of the patrons as you could, smiling brightly to all of them as you made your way to the ballroom, grabbing a glass of champagne on the way.

You tried to spot Kylo amongst the sea of people, thinking it would be easy, but you couldn’t see him. Instead, your eyes found Armitage Hux and Gwen Phasma, stood around a table talking to friends you hadn’t seen for years; Poe, Finn and Rose.

Hux and Phasma had similar roles to you, working alongside Kylo with the First Order. While Kylo and Hux struggled to get along most days, you, Hux and Phasma were as thick as thieves.

Poe was the first to spot you, his face breaking out into his signature smile. You smiled back, practically running over to him and throwing your arms around his neck. In your heels, you were just as tall as him, making it easier to hug him. “Look at you!” he exclaimed, picking you up and spinning you around on the spot, causing a laugh to erupt from your lungs.

“For the love of God, Poe! Put me down!” you continued to laugh, clinging on to his shoulders for dear life. He finally put you down, hands staying at your waist while he looked at you.

“It’s good to see you again, kid,” he said, using the nickname he gave to you all those years ago. “We’ve missed you.”

“I know,” you said solemnly. You hugged everyone in turn, saying how good it was to see everyone and how much you had missed them. You smiled at everyone around you, enjoying that the fact that your friends, both old and new, were under the safe roof and not trying to kill one another. “Where is the man of the hour? I drive all this way and I don’t get greeted at the steps,” you joked, still looking around for Kylo. You also realised there was another person missing. “And Rey too, I thought she would have been here already.”

“I think they’re going over some last few details before the dinner,” Gwen spoke up, a bit too quickly you thought. You raised an eyebrow before shrugging off the feeling.

“Well, how about a toast. To friends, old and new,” you smiled, raising your champagne glass. Everyone around you followed suit, the clinking of champagne glasses filling the air as they all echoed your sentiment.

You had a good feeling about this party.

\-----

Half an hour later, you had managed to talk to most people who worked for the Resistance, catching up and flattering them with your deadly charm. You couldn’t lie, it had actually been lovely to speak to all these people who you hadn’t spoken to in so long.

You were sat on a table with your friends, Gwen to your right and Poe to your left. Finn, Hux and Rose completed the table. As the right hand aids for both the Resistance and First Order, you had been grouped together. Thankfully, you all seemed to get on, even Hux had been making small talk with Rose while you waited for the leaders to arrive.

It had been upsetting slightly, not being able to see Kylo before dinner. You had wanted to show off your outfit, an outfit that he had specifically asked you to wear. Nonetheless, there was still the dancing that would take place afterwards, giving you plenty of time to show off.

You sat waiting patiently, sharing small talk with both Gwen and Poe when the sound of the grand double doors opening broke your focus. You tried to hide your smile but failed when you saw the black mop of hair flit through the door. You didn’t even notice Han and Leia walking in front of him, you just saw Kylo.

Your eyes met for the briefest of seconds, that was until you realised Rey was stood on his left side, clinging to his arm for dear life. You smile faltered, and you noticed both Gwen and Poe shuffle awkwardly beside you. You took in a deep breath, trying to not let your mind spin.

You noticed Kylo wasn’t even looking at you, he had his eyes trained on the four empty seats at the table one over from yours. Han and Leia took their place, followed by Kylo and Rey. You could feel your hands shaking as Leia began talking.

“My dear friends, it’s so wonderful to see all of you here,” Leia began. None of the four people that had just made their entrance had taken their seats, all still remained standing. “It is my pleasure, and honour, to welcome back my son after four years. This party is to celebrate the union between the First Order and the Resistance, a new era for both of us.” Leia smiled up at her son, a smile he happily returned. “Would you like to make your announcement, honey?” she said to Kylo.

_Announcement?_

Your brows furrowed slightly as Kylo turned to talk to everyone in the room. “I’d like to thank everyone for the warm welcome I’ve received, it means a great deal to me. But I know I have a lot to prove, I know I have to gain your trust, which is what I plan on doing,” he paused momentarily, finding the right words to use. “Our peace must be solidified, and it is for that reason I have decided to get married…to Rey.”

Shocked gasps and excited murmurs surrounded you. But all you could hear was the beating of your heart, the sounding ringing in your ears. You couldn’t tear your eyes off of Rey and Kylo as they smiled at one another. You saw Rey say something, but you didn’t hear it. You saw her lean up, Kylo meeting halfway as their lips pressed together in a kiss.

You felt your heart shatter as thunderous applause shook through the room. Both of them pulled away, a smile on both of their lips. Leaning slightly towards Gwen, who was clapping softly, you spoke to her, your gaze still trained on Kylo and Rey. “Did you know anything about this?”

She stopped clapping and you both looked at one another. “Yes,” she said softly. “We wanted to tell you bu-”

“We? How many of you knew?” you asked calmly. You were far too calm. And that only made you even more dangerous.

“Everyone at this table, Han, Leia, Kylo, Rey and Luke.” Your fists clenched at the sound of Luke’s name. Even _he_ knew and you didn’t. “That was what the meeting was about a month ago. Han and Leia didn’t want you there, they knew about you and Kylo. Believe me when I say we wanted to tell you. We even begged Kylo to tell you before tonight…” Gwen simply trailed off, her eyes softening as she looked at you. “I’m so sorry.”

“I’m leaving,” you said, ignoring her apology. “When dinner is served, I’m going to say I’m going to the toilet, and I’m just going to leave,” you told her. She said nothing, simply nodded, knowing there wasn’t any point in arguing with you.

You could feel the eyes of everyone at your table staring at you. You kept your back straight and your head high, but your eyes stared down at the golden place setting in front of you. Your breathing was heavy, borderline furious as you kept your fists clenched in your lap.

The moment the starter was placed in front of you, you were out of your seat, excusing yourself and saying you needed the toilet. Everyone at your table knew that was a lie.

You left the ballroom in a cloud of emerald green silk, the material billowing behind you as you hastily made your way out of the room and down the vast hallway. You heard your name being called, the voice belonging to the last person you want to see right now. You picked up your pace, running as fast as you could in your heels. But you were no match for Kylo. His long legs easily catching up with you.

You felt a hand grip the top of your arm, gripping enough so you couldn’t get away, but not so tight as to leave a mark. He whispered your name, almost like it was taboo for him to even be talking to you. “Please, just let me explain.”

“I think your mother explained everything perfectly well,” you spat. Tear filled your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. You refused to cry in front of Kylo Ren. “I have given everything I have to you,” you snarled as you turned to full face him, squaring up to him. “I left my friends and my family, for _you!_ I have been there since the beginning, and now I’m being tossed aside for someone who sliced your face in half!”

Kylo’s grip hadn’t released from your arm. He stared down at you; eyes soft as you continued. “Y’know what? I’m not even that angry you’re marrying her, actually it makes sense, I don’t know why I didn’t think of it sooner. But do you want to know what I’m really mad at? It’s the fact you didn’t tell me. You make me dress up for you, like some sort of second rate whore.”

“You’re not a-”

“Save it! Because clearly I am a whore, I’ve been your little fucking cock-warmer since I sewed up that scar Rey fucking gave to you! And a part of me was stupid enough to think that I meant more to you. Now I see I was only a warm body for your bed.”

You grasped the hand that was grabbing your right arm and pulled it off you, throwing it back to his side. Before he could say anything else, you turned and walked out of the house, disappearing into the night.

You phoned Dopheld, asking for him to come pick you up as tears streamed down your face. No-one else had come to see you, a part of you was thankful for that. You thought about what you could do. You knew you couldn’t stay in New York, continuing to work for Kylo while he planned his wedding. Maybe, you thought, maybe you should contact your parents.

After you ran away with Kylo, they had fled back to England, you older sister in tow. Maybe after four years, it was time to pay them a visit.


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

_**Present Day** _

_Think of you with pipe and slippers,_

_Think of her in bed…_

You groaned hearing the song, which at one point had been your favourite. Now ‘Don’t Marry Her’ by the Beautiful South seemed to be more ironic given the card life had seemingly dealt you. You pressed the pause button on your touchscreen console, putting your car in complete silence.

The last year had gone by in a whirlwind. You hadn’t kept in contact with anyone, all your friends you had been so excited to see that night, forgotten in an instant. You had practically fled New York that night, had only grabbed enough clothes for a few days before you were out of your flat door and on your way to the airport. You had even left your phone sitting on the coffee table in your flat, not wanting anyone to contact you.

When you finally landed back in England, you were met with the typical torrential downpour of rain. It seemed rather fitting.

It wasn’t a warm welcome home, that was for sure. The only person happy to see you had been your dad, after all, you always were his favourite. The reception from your mum and sister, however, were vastly different. Your sister had repeatedly slapped you while calling you every single name under the sun. Your mum had stood there, staring daggers straight through you, disgusted that you would even show your face to them again.

“You _abandoned_ us for that _stupid boy_ and that _wretched man_.” She had spat at you. You felt the hatred she had for you.

You couldn’t blame her. Your decision to run off with Ben had shook your family right to its core. Both your father and Ben’s father had been lifelong friends, and when you ran away you had presumed that they had grown closer together, finding solace during that terrible time. Alas, it had the opposite effect, each of the men blaming the other for how their children had turned out.

It had been a long healing process between you and your family, but now, finally, you were on the right path. You had all returned back to New York about a month ago. Your Dad and Han had reconnected as well, their decades old friendship once again restored. Everything was perfect for everyone.

Except for you.

You had told your parents everything that led up to you standing on their doorstep, soaking wet from the classic British rain. They had listened intently, hanging on to every word you had to say to them. You had broken down in tears when you told them Kylo had gotten engaged to Rey, causing your sister and your mother’s hard expressions to fade and be replaced with sympathetic looks. You had stayed with them this whole time, not bothering to find a new place. You didn’t even move out when you got engaged.

Soon after your departure, rumours began spreading throughout the First Order and the Resistance. Rumours that you were more than just Kylo Ren’s right hand woman, that you were a woman scorned and you had no idea about the engagement announcement.

All of that was obviously true. But your parents knew you had to downplay it. A month after you had left, your parents made the announcement that you were engaged, that was the reason you had run off back home, your ‘boyfriend’ wanted to propose to you.

That was how relations between your Dad and Han was mended, Han and Leia reached out to congratulate you on your engagement, and that it was simply _wonderful_ both you and Kylo had found happiness after so long.

You had wanted to put a bullet straight through them after reading their congratulatory note.

Your fiancé, Oliver, was nice. But that was it. He was just nice. He wasn’t unattractive, he was average height, brown haired and brown eyed. He treated you well but there was nothing there. No spark, no burning desire for one another. He tried, you had to give him that. He tried to get you to love him, did everything right for you. But it wasn’t the same. He could never be Kylo.

You had heard of Oliver before, he was a son of one of your Dad’s associates, but given your past, you hadn’t had much to do with him over the years.

These two factors, your Dad and Han’s reconciliation and your engagement led you to where you were now, driving to your parents new home to get ready for yet another grand Solo-Organa party. It was Han’s birthday, which meant a large celebration was in order. While you had stayed with your parents while you lived in England, Oliver decided it was probably for the best that the two of you get your own apartment while living in New York.

You were dreading tonight. Absolutely dreading it. You knew people would ask questions, even though your parents had set you up nicely with a cover story, there would still be questions.

There was your friends you had to consider too. Poe, Finn and Rose hadn’t seen you for four years, and by the time you had all reconciled you were running away once more. Knowing that you hurt them, scared them even, shook you to your core.

Then, of course, there was Kylo and Rey. The thought of seeing them, clinging on to one another as if their lives depended on it made you feel sick. Nothing in the world was going to prepare you for tonight.

After driving in silence for what felt like hours, you finally arrived at your parents mansion and your old family home. Han and Leia had kept it for them, in the hopes that one day both you and Kylo would return. You realised that had, actually, been a rather lovely thing for them to have done. You had so many memories of this place, it would have been a shame to never return to it.

Your car door was already being opened by the family butler, Carson, before you had even turned the engine off. “Good afternoon, ma’am,” he said while holding out his hand for you to take. You smiled softly at him.

“Good afternoon, Carson. How’s the family? I heard you became a grandfather for the third time last week, congratulations.”

He beamed proudly at your words. “Yes ma’am, a little girl. Mother and baby are doing well, and my wife is extremely happy to have a granddaughter.” You chuckled softly at his admission, before bidding him goodbye and walking into the house.

Your red-bottom heels clacked on the marble floor of the foyer, echoing throughout the large room. “Mum? Dad?” you called out.

“In the drawing room, sweetheart!” You heard your mother’s voice call out. It sounded faint, given how far away the drawing room actually was. As much as you loved this house, the size was ridiculous given that there were only four of you growing up. While the family had extended somewhat; your sister was now married with a young son, it still seemed far too large.

You pushed open the door to reveal your family, including Oliver, sat around drinking tea and chatting idly about God knows what. “Ah, I see you took your time getting here,” you mother chimed before you even managed to sit down. You thought you could sit and have a nice conversation before getting ready, but maybe you’d just start getting ready now.

“Traffic was bad,” you mumbled as you pressed a kiss to your Dad’s cheek. As always, he was sat dressed in a sleek black three piece suit, an emerald green tie perched neatly around his neck. His golden signet ring, which he wore on the fourth finger on his left hand, shone in the light. Both you and your sister had one as well, choosing to wear it on your right hand instead. The family coat of arms, a phoenix flanked by two dragons, had been etched perfectly into them. It was probably your most prized possession.

You threw a cursory glance over to Oliver, smiling slightly as you did. You felt bad for him, you really did. He was thrown into a marriage with a woman who would never be able to love him. He was already part of the crime syndicate your family was part of, but now his marriage to you only pushed him further up the ranks, putting more risk on to his life. If you had your way, he wouldn’t be marrying you.

But that was the problem with crime families; blood was always thicker than water.

“What time do we have to be at the Solo’s?” You asked no-one in particular.

“The party starts at eight, but I was thinking we could get there for half seven, I wanted to talk to Han about business,” your Dad replied, his thick New Jersey accent penetrating the room.

It had always made you laugh, your mother had a crisp south English accent, an accent both you and your sister had. But your dad, ever a New Jersey boy, had the strongest New Jersey accent you had ever heard. It had always made you laugh when you were a child, hearing the two different accents converse with one another.

“That gives me three and a half hours, I’d better start getting ready. I want to shower after the drive up here,” you lied. You didn’t need three and a half hours to get ready, you felt fresh and clean, and most of your makeup was done already. But you needed that time to gather your thoughts, calm yourself before the shit storm that would be tonight.

Your sister and parents knew that, they knew what this night meant for you. Even though you didn’t see eye to eye with your mother, she was nonetheless sympathetic towards the situation you found yourself in.

“Let me do your hair for you, Sissy?” Your elder sister, Emilia, asked you. You smiled warmly at her, nodding your head.

Sometimes, a girl just needed her big sister.

\-----

“So what are you going to do if you see him tonight?” Your sister asked you from behind. Currently, she was stood behind you, hair grips between her teeth while she worked on your hair.

You let out a long and heavy sigh. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it. I just hope that seeing Poe, Finn, Rose, Phasma and Hux will calm my nerves. I don’t even want to think about seeing Kylo.”

“Ben,” she said. “A lot of people have been calling him Ben since he came back.”

You snorted out a soft laugh. “I haven’t called him Ben in five years, I don’t think I’m going to start now.” Emilia smiled softly at you in the mirror. Her hands dropped from your hair, coming to rest on your shoulders, thumbs rubbing back and forth over the soft skin there.

“You really loved him didn’t you?” she asked softly. For all the lies you could tell everyone else, you could never lie to your sister, she saw through you far too easily.

Tears stung your eyes as you were faced with the harsh reality that came with loving a taken man. “Yeah…I really did. Still do I think. I’m sure I’ll find out tonight.” You gave a small smile, trying to ease the tension. Emilia’s arms wrapped around your shoulders as she hugged your back, squeezing your body against hers.

“I’ll be right beside you the entire night. If you need me, come find me and I’ll remove you from the situation, okay?”

You nodded, your hands reaching and squeezing hers that were clasped over your chest. She pressed a kissed to your forehead before standing up and moving away. “I think you’re ready, just need to put on your dress,” she exclaimed, bounding over to your walk in closet were your navy silk Jason Wu dress hung.

The dress was soft to the touch, coming down to hit your legs mid-calf. The straps crossed over the back, leaving most of your back exposed. It was loose enough for you to move, but also fitted enough to show off your curves. Paired with your gold heeled sandals, you knew you would look effortlessly glamourous.

Your makeup was simple, a soft smokey eye paired with a subtle lip, nothing too bold since the dress did most of the talking for you. Eyeing yourself in the mirror, you realised that you were, in fact, quite stunning.

You smiled at yourself in the mirror, your hands running over the soft, smooth silk of the dress.

“Well if that doesn’t get his attention, I don’t know what will,” Emilia commented, drawing a laugh from you as she did. “C’mon, let’s get going before Mum starts screaming at us.”

\-----

For the first time in a year, you stood staring up at the massive mansion that only a year ago, you had ran out of. The Solo-Organa house hadn’t changed, not one bit, since the last time you were here. The only difference was that tonight was a more intimate gathering, just friends, as Han and Leia liked to say.

The irony was most of the people weren’t actually their friends. Every birthday, gala, party, whatever it was, it was always a coverup as a pissing competition, seeing which family had the most power, influence and money. It was boring, but that’s just how things were done.

Standing in the same spot you stood in a year ago, you scanned the ballroom, trying to see if you could spot any of your friends. Emilia was on your left hand side, her son attached to her hip and her husband’s right arm wrapped firmly around her. Oliver stood to your right; his left hand placed in the small of your back.

Your parents had already disappeared, off talking to both Han and Leia. You hadn’t stayed too long for the formalities with the Solo-Organa’s, a simple ‘hello’ and ‘yes it has been so long’ was enough for you at the moment.

You sister looked at you, scanning your face to find any unease. Before your sister could open her mouth to try and ease your tension, someone yelling your name from behind you sounded through the entire ballroom.

You managed to turn around to the sound, but you were practically rugby tackled into a bear hug by the same person who had yelled your name, causing everyone in the room to turn and look at you. You stumbled back slightly, and Oliver’s hand fell from you. The person pulled back and you were met with beaming face of Finn.

Upon seeing his face, all the tension washed out of your body and a smile managed to find its way to your lips. “Jesus Finn are you trying to kill me?” you teased, hitting his left shoulder for good measure before pulling him into another bone crushing hug.

“Well you will keep disappearing on us,” he teased, pulling his arms just that little bit tighter around your body. It was as if he was trying to keep you there; if he let go you’d disappear.

“I’m not going anywhere this time.” Your whispered promise made him ease up slightly, his arms slowly unwinding from your body.

“We understood, we all did. None of us blame you for leaving. I just want you to know that,” Finn told you sincerely.

All this time you had been worrying that they would hate you. There was finally, finally, peace between the two rivals for the first time in four years, and a chance to reconnect; all that was dwindled when you ran away once again.

But hearing those words fall from Finn’s lips caused your heart to swell. It made the rest of the night seem just that little less daunting. “Thank you,” you managed to spit out, the lump at the back of your throat causing you to choke. “That really means a lot to me.”

He smiled once again, that big, bright smile that could get even the grumpiest person in the room to crack a small smile. He turned to Oliver, extending out his hand for him to shake. “Finn, I’m an old friend,” he said as he grasped Oliver’s hand in his. Oliver smile softly as he returned the handshake.

“It’s great to meet you,” Oliver confessed, “I’ve heard so much about you.”

That was a lie, and even Finn knew it. But nonetheless, he smiled at Oliver. “Is it okay if I steal her away for a little while? There are several people who are just _dying_ to see you again,” Finn teased you, throwing a wink your way. You simply rolled your eyes as you wrapped your right hand around his arm. Oliver chuckled, gesturing that it was perfectly fine to take you away.

Just as you were out of earshot of Oliver, Finn spoke up once again. “He seems nice. He treating you right?” he asked. You were glad he hadn’t lost that protectiveness streak he had. Despite being two years younger than you, he had always looked out for you like an older brother. Both Poe and Finn did in fact. It was a comforting thought, that even after all this time, he still wanted to protect you.

“Yes. He’s nice, he knows it’s a marriage of convenience, but what he doesn’t know is that I was in love with one of the most powerful men in all of New York,” you smiled sadly at Finn. “My parents just said to his that I was getting on, hadn’t found a man to marry and that their son was a good fit.”

“You were getting on?! You were only 25 last year!”

“I know but look at Emilia. She has two years on me, and she’s married with a son already.”

“I thought you didn’t want kids,” Finn teased.

“I don’t, but that’s beside the point,” you chuckled. “My parents were worried with the rumours that were going around, I know they did it to protect me and for that, I think I’ll always be grateful.”

You had been so engrossed in your conversation with Finn that you hadn’t even realised the crowd of friends that began surrounding you until the familiar voices of Poe, Phasma, Rose and Hux began sounding in your ears.

You smiled at each of them, so pleased and overwhelmed that all they had to offer you was their love and affection. Your eyes landed on Phasma, your last interaction had been less than warm, but you knew it was your fault. It wasn’t fair to lash out at her for keeping Kylo’s secret, she wasn’t the one to blame. “I’m so sorry for how I acted to you,” you confessed to her as you gripped her in a tight hug. A soft noise, which you realised had been a laugh escaped her mouth.

“Are you kidding me? I was expecting you to go full Tony Montana on everyone,” she teased, sending you into a fit of laughter. It was true. You had a pretty significant kill list, you were ruthless. Who would have thought that one man could completely disintegrate that?

You hugged everyone with all the might that you could. It felt safe, familiar, being surrounded by all these people. It was a bigger comfort to you than being back with your family. Just as you were finally feeling at peace and getting into the swing of being back with your old friends, their faces dropped.

Your brows furrowed in confusion as you looked at them. Poe gestured behind you. You turned on the spot, and your heart jumped up into your throat.

There stood Kylo, dressed in a gorgeous black three-piece suit, with Rey clutching on to his arm, her engagement ring catching the light as they both moved to talk to various guests. Just as you were about to look away, Kylo’s eyes landed on you. The bright smile that he wore as he shook hands and conversed with guests dropped instantly. The arm that was practically held hostage by Rey’s hand fell limp at his side.

Every part of your body was screaming at you to run, to stop looking at him. But you couldn’t. You hadn’t thought after that night that you would have been back. But here you were, stood staring right at the man who had broken your heart, his fiancée cling to his arm just like she had done that night.

All of your feelings came flooding back, every kiss, every touch and every caress you shared flashed through your mind. You had to stop, had to stop thinking about him. He was engaged.

And so were you.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you broke eye contact with him. Your body turned back to face your friends. You took a deep breath before saying to them, “I think I’m going to get some air. I’m not running away, I promise. I need to face this problem but right now, I feel like I can’t breathe.”

Hux’s hand reached for yours, his thumb rubbing back and forth over your smooth skin. “Take the time you need; we’ll be here for you.”

You could have cried. Hux wasn’t exactly known for his comforting ways, but the way he cared for you made you feel like you could have done anything in that moment. Smiling softly at the group, you exited, finding the closest balcony you could.

The Solo-Organa house was filled with French doors that led out onto extensive balconies, perfect for taking a moment or two to regain composure.

Slipping through the closest French doors, you reached into your navy clutch, fishing around for you packet of cigarettes and a lighter. You didn’t normally smoke, but sometimes, every now and again, you needed the surge of nicotine to help you keep calm. As you inhaled deeply, before blowing away the smoke, you looked at the glorious gardens beneath you that were littered with fairy lights, illuminating the generous walkway. You smiled at the memory of you, Rey, Rose, Finn and Poe, playing hide and seek amongst the rose bushes, trying to keep quiet as Kylo tried to find you all. He always found you first, he knew you like the back of his hand; knowing which places you preferred to hide in.

You took another deep drag of your cigarette, trying to block the memory from you mind. Slowly but surely, it was working.

Just as you were starting to calm down, the nicotine pumping through your bloodstream, the peace was shattered.

A deep, baritone voice that pierced your soul. You stood frozen; body still turned to be staring out at the vast expanse of the Solo-Organa estate. Slowly, you felt your body turn. The cigarette was no longer placed gently between your fingers, instead it was now held in a vice-like grip.

Finally, you came face-to-face with Kylo, you heart practically fell into your stomach as your slightly teary eyes fell on his face. He smile softly, slightly awkwardly at you, his hands finding their way into his trouser pockets.

“Hey you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops so this chapter kind of got away from me...  
> I hope you all enjoy it and don't worry, we'll be seeing much more of Kylo in the next one ;)


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

His words hit you like a tonne of bricks. ‘Hey you’? That’s all he had to say to you? A whole year, and all he could say was ‘hey you’.

“What do you want?” Your gaze was hard as you looked at him. You tried to not show any emotion, tried to not let Kylo see that him standing in front of you was practically killing you. It didn’t work. Your eyes gave you away. They were abundant with unshed tears, completely betraying the rest of your body.

Kylo sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “Look, I know we didn’t leave on best of terms-”

“That’s one way of putting it,” you interjected, cutting off his speech he was about to say. He just looked at you rather than finishing what he was saying. His eyes were soft, dejected even as he stared right at you.

“I’ve missed you,” he finally said. The words were so quiet, you barely heard them over the partying that was going on inside.

You chuckled harshly, shaking your head as your arms unfolded. “I can’t believe you,” you said to him.

You took another long drag of your cigarette before blowing the smoke in his direction, casting a smokey haze over his face. His face twisted at the action, the smell of nicotine hitting him. “Have you forgotten all about respect?” he seethed, his hand grabbing you wrist in a vice like grip.

You scoffed at him. “Bit ironic for you to be preaching about respect after what you did to me, don’t you think?”

His grip on your wrist loosened, allowing you to slide you hand away from his. His face visibly fell. In fact, his whole body seemed to slump at your words. “That’s not fair,” he mumbled, his hands finding their way back into his pockets.

You crossed your arms over your chest, staring down at him. “You really want to talk about fair? You’re seriously playing the ‘fair’ card right now?”

You felt angry, an anger you never thought you could achieve. You knew that he knew the torment he had caused, he knew how much it had broken you to see him get engaged to another woman, especially Rey of all people.

“How is she?” you asked, finally discarding your cigarette into the crystal ash tray on the table beside you. “How’s Rey?” you asked again after Kylo’s silence began to deafen you.

He just shrugged.

He was engaged to her, and all he could do was shrug. “Really? That’s all you’re giving me?”

“Well what do you want me to say? Hmm?!” He finally raised his voice to you, throwing his arms out in exasperation. “Do you want me to say that I barely talk to her? Do you want me to say that she’s been off planning that stupid _fucking wedding_ while I’ve been trying to make sure that we don’t get infiltrated by the Hutts, the Fetts or the Crimson Dawn? What do you want me to tell you?!” He got closer and closer with each question he asked. Before you knew it, your lower back was pressed against the metal railing on the balcony, Kylo’s hands gripping the railing at either side of your body.

You could feel his breath on your cheek as he breathed deeply, his anger paramount. “Do you want me to tell you it’s you that I think of every time I close my eyes?” his voice was low and breathy as he spoke in your ear. Despite the hot July night, you shivered.

You stared up into his beautiful brown eyes, although looking at them, they were practically black, blown out through either anger or desire, you weren’t quite sure. “You have a fiancée…” you weakly managed to mutter, your hands finding purchase on his chest.

For a minute, you had a reality check. This was the man who shattered your heart in front of hundreds of people. The man who announced he was marrying a woman that, at one point, you considered to be your best friend. The man who let you walk out of his life with no questions asked. You went to push him away with your left hand, but he caught it in his own hand.

“So do you,” he whispered, bringing your left hand up to his lips and pressing a chaste kiss on the simple solitaire diamond ring that sat on your third finger. It hurt you, genuinely hurt you to see the man that you loved kissing the engagement ring he _hadn’t_ given you.

Somehow, somewhere, you managed to regain some sense and whatever was left of your dignity. Pulling your hand from his, you placed it back on his chest, effectively pushing him away this time round. He took the hint, putting space between the two of you.

“In answer to your question, what I want you to say,” you finally answered, steeling your gaze as you looked at him. “Is that you’re sorry.” Your voice broke, just that little bit, at the end of the sentence as tears, once again, filled your eyes. “You’ve told me all this shit, while your fiancée stands in that room there, not knowing what the hell is happening out here. I told you, last year, that marrying Rey made sense. And it still does. But I want to hear your side. If I meant anything, and I mean _anything_ to you, why didn’t you fight for me?” A stray tear escaped your eye, which you quickly brushed away.

Kylo’s silence was deafening. Realising you weren’t getting an answer any time soon, you walked away from him, leaving him stranded and alone on the balcony.

You made your way back inside, eyes scanning the room to find your friends once again. Your hands were shaking, everything minute of your interaction with Kylo was replaying through your mind.

The crowd had gotten significantly bigger since you had been outside, your friends who were once off to the left of the ballroom were no longer there. You tried to remain calm, they couldn’t have gotten far.

Before you even had a chance to look around, a large hand was grabbing the top of your right arm, dragging you away towards the side exit of the ballroom. Looking up, you saw Kylo once again, his gaze firmly locked in front of him.

“What are you doing? Let me go!” You seethed, trying to free your arm from his grip, but it was to no avail. You were practically jogging to keep up with his ridiculously long strides.

Pushing through the white doors and into the hallway, he continued to drag you, paying no mind to the various guests and members of staff that looked at him quizzically. “I’ve had just about enough of you tonight Ren! Now, let me go!” You hissed, once again trying to rip your arm from his grip.

Storming down a corridor that was void of any guests, Kylo yanked open the second door on the right, carelessly throwing you inside. He followed soon after, slamming and locking the door behind him.

You rubbed your arm where his hand had been as you looked around the large office room you had been thrown into. A large brown oak desk sat in front of the large windows, which had been hidden by the light cream coloured curtains. Shelving covered each side wall, bookcases full of various book titles, all stacked neatly beside one another. The hardwood floor echoed with every step you and Kylo took.

“What the _hell_ are you playing at?!” You yelled at him as he finally turned to face you.

“I don’t want to marry Rey,” he all but blurted out. You froze on the spot, the anger you held in you rapidly dissipating. “I don’t want to marry her, and I know I should have told you before the party that I was marrying her. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry that you had to find out that way and I’m sorry that I didn’t fight for you.”

He sounded so sincere, like a small child who was apologising for running away from his parents while they were shopping. He stepped closer and you allowed him, your feet firmly planted on the floor. “I didn’t think okay? I didn’t know that you loved me, you never said anything…”

“Don’t you _dare_ blame this on me!” You yelled, your index finger jabbing in his direction.

“I’m not! I’m just… _God!_ I just _need_ you to know that you leaving changed everything for me. You’d always been there for me, and then you weren’t. You didn’t even say goodbye!”

“Well it’s not like you left me with much choice!” you readily snapped back. “Do you know how _humiliating_ it was for me to be sat there while you announced your engagement, all of my friends looking at me with big, sad, sympathetic eyes! I was in a dress that _you_ bought for me, that _you_ asked me to wear and it was _you_ who couldn’t be bothered to grow a set of balls and _tell me!_ ” You yelled, your fingers jabbed in his direction, emphasising your frustration.

You sighed, shoulders slumping in defeat. “I gave you everything, Kylo. And you couldn’t even tell me.”

Suddenly, his hands were on your waist, pulling you against his body. You tried to fight him, tried to push him away but he only tugged you closer. “ _Stop it, just listen_ ,” he said through gritted teeth, his fingers flexing into the silk of your dress and the flesh of your waist. “I’m _sorry_ , okay? I should have told you; I know I should have. But I didn’t, and I can’t take that back. But you don’t get to stand there and pretend you’re innocent. Running away from me, flying back to England and getting engaged to some _stranger_. I had to hear it from Mom and Dad, they told me in front of Rey, and it took everything I had to not lose my _shit_ at the fact you were with some other guy.”

His confession made your head spin. “It’s not the same Kylo…” you muttered; your noses almost touching.

“I know that…” he whispered as he pressed his forehead to yours. “ _I never should have let you slip away._ ”

In an instant, he was on you, his plush lips pressing against yours in a desperate kiss. For a moment, you were shocked, oblivious to the fact that Kylo had his lips pressed to yours. But all of that faded away. You happily and willingly returned the kiss. His hands were all over you, running up and down your bare back, pulling you as close as he possibly could. One hand rested on your left hip, fingers digging into the flesh there every now and again, while the other hand descended over your arse, palming your cheek in his large hand. You moaned into his mouth, the calloused skin of his hands burning into your flesh.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth as your own hands ran up his taut chest, over his large shoulders and to the nape of his neck, tugging at the inky black curls that resided there. He groaned into your mouth at the sensation, breaking the kiss to plant kisses down the column of your neck.

In an instant, his hands hand dropped to the backs of your thighs, lifting you up as if you weighed nothing and walking you back to the large desk, placing you directly on top of it. The coolness of the desk soothed your burning flesh, so hot from Kylo’s hands and kisses.

“Kylo…” you moaned breathlessly as his lips explored down your neck. He explored down your shoulders, his free hand coming up to palm your left breast in his hand. Given the open back of your dress, you had gone braless for the night. At his touch, your arched into his palm, your hips bucking in search of any kind of friction.

“This needs to come off,” Kylo groaned heavily, his hands running up and down your sides. He reached behind to the zip on your dress, tugging it down. You stood from the desk and reached down to grab the hem in your hand, slowly dragging the garment off your body. You dropped the material to the side, leaving you just in your navy lace thong and heels. Kylo’s eyes roamed over your body, like a starving animal looking at its prey.

He practically pounced on you again, lifting and dropping you back on the desk. Your gasp was silenced by Kylo’s lips, his hand trailing over your breasts, down your stomach and to the top of your mound. He stayed there, not moving any further, but his fingers continued to tease you no less. Touching anywhere but where you wanted him, you desperately whined into his mouth. He broke the kiss once again, and pressed his forehead to yours, a smirk playing on his lips as he continued to tease you. “What do you want, darling?” he teased.

 _Well, two can play at that game_.

Biting your bottom lip ever so slightly, you moved your hand from his neck, slowly trailing down his chest until it reached the large bulge that had formed in his trousers. You smoothed you hand over his length, running your hand up and down, jerking him off over his pants. A low, guttural moan came deep from his chest at the feeling of your hands on him. You smirked at the power of him. “How many people could bring Kylo Ren to his knees?” you teased in his ear, biting the flesh of his lobe as you gripped him in your hand.

He gripped your wrist, halting your movements. “Don’t push your luck,” he hissed as he yanked you off the desk. He turned you round and pressed your chest against the cold wood, baring your arse and soaking panties to him. “I haven’t forgotten what you liked, darling.” His words were like liquid honey in your ears and a soft moan escaped your lips. “My right hand woman, so ruthless and terrifying, you could bring anyone to their knees,” he continued, his hot breath hitting your neck with every word his spoke. “And yet, here you are. Bent over my fathers desk, ass proudly in the air with a dripping wet cunt.”

A _whooshing_ sound filled the air before a loud _crack_ as one of his impossibly large hands collided with the right cheek of your arse. You let out a loud moan, loud enough so that anyone outside the door could have heard you.

A large hand covered your mouth, silencing your loud moans. “Careful, darling. We wouldn’t want my _fiancée_ to hear you _screaming_ my name would we?” he taunted. Your cunt clenched at his words, your heartbeat quickening at the thought of getting caught. “Oh…” he smirked against you, “you _do_ want her to hear.” His dark chuckle sounded through the room. “This is new, you were never like this when I was fucking you before,” he groaned as his free hand came back down over your left arse cheek.

You tried to talk but it came out as a mumbled mess against Kylo’s hand. You shuddered as you finally felt Kylo’s fingers trailing over your clothed slit, rubbing over the wetness that had pooled in your panties. An audible groan fell from Kylo’s lips as he released your mouth from his grip. “Fuck, darling,” he groaned as he cupped your entire cunt with his hand, completely slicking it up. “You’re so fucking wet.”

A quick slap landed on your clothed pussy, a yelp leaving your mouth as the tips of his fingers brushed your clit. Just as quickly as he slapped you, he yanked down your thong, letting it pool at your ankles. “Turn around for me, darling. Ass on the desk,” he ordered as he trailed his hands over the outside of your thighs.

Not in the mood to challenge him, you did as he asked, quickly turning on the spot and hopping up onto the desk. You spread your legs for him without him even asking, causing a smirk to play on his lips.

Without saying a word, he sank to his knees in front of you. You bit your bottom lip in anticipation as Kylo pulled you closer to the edge of the desk, arse barely hanging on. You gripped the desk in your hands, knuckles turning white as you clung on for dear life. “Be good for me,” he said as he trailed kisses up both of your thighs, leaving sporadic bite marks as he went. He sucked on various bits of skin, again leaving marks. You remembered he liked doing this, he liked to leave marks over your body, whether people could see them or not. To him, there was something so intimate about it.

Without hesitation, Kylo licked at your cunt, devouring your slick from entrance to clit. You bit your lip to silence a moan that threatened to fall from your mouth. It had been so long since you had had any kind of sexual connection to anyone. You had tried with Oliver, hoping to fuck Kylo out of your mind but that hadn’t worked. Nothing would ever compare to him.

He knew your body like the back of his hand, knew when to lick and when to suck. He knew how many fingers it would take to make you a quivering mess. He was in tune to every one of your knees. “How I’ve missed you,” Kylo moaned against your cunt, his eyes flicking up and searching yours. His lips closed around your clit, sucking and releasing it with a _pop_. His tongue trailed over you, sliding down to your entrance, trusting in and out of you, driving you insane.

“Please Kylo,” you gasped, one of your hands lacing through his dark inky locks. “You know what you need to do.”

“Beg,” he demanded, moving his mouth away from your needy cunt and to your inner thigh, pressing gentle kisses to the skin there. “Beg me for it.”

You were desperate, desperate for release from the only man who could give it to you. “Fuck…please Kylo…I-I need your fingers in me…pleasepleaseplease…I need your fingers, Kylo,” you babbled breathlessly, fingers gripping the stands of hair that you could reach. You bucked your hips towards him in another desperate plea.

Kylo looked up at you and placed another bite in your thigh before latching his mouth onto your clit, thrusting two fingers deep into you. You let out a loud moan, not caring that people could hear you if they were to walk past. Neither did Kylo, it seemed, as he lavished his mouth and tongue at your clit, his fingers working inside of you; scissoring you and stretching you in preparation for his cock. The curl of his fingers against you sweet spot had your hips bucking up to his face, grinding against him. He moaned against you, vibrations going straight through you. “I’m going to cum…I’m going to cum,” you panted. Your stomach tightening as your mouth was thrown open in a breathless scream as your orgasm hit, practically gushing over Kylo’s mouth and fingers. Your thighs shook and quaked as he continued finger-fucking you through your orgasm, moaning and lapping up everything you had to offer to him.

You fell back against the cold desk, panting heavily. You stared at the ceiling, trying to get your heartrate back down. The sound of clothes shuffling sounded through the room; the sound of a zipper and fabric falling to the floor caused you to sit up, resting on your elbows.

Your eyes widened and you bit your lip as you watched Kylo slowly stroking is large cock, the tip red and dripping with precum. He was still dress, his trousers only partway down his thighs while you lay there, dressed in nothing but your heels. “You look so fucking gorgeous, darling,” Kylo grunted, his hand gripping the base of his cock to stave off him orgasm. “You think you can take me, darling? It’s been so long,” he taunted as he manoeuvred you back to the edge of the desk, the tip of his cock tracing random patterns over your throbbing cunt.

“I can take it; I can take it…I promise Kylo…fuck…just please fuck me…it’s been so long, Kylo…please!” you begged again.

“Fuck you’re so good to me,” he grunted as he lined up at your entrance, slowly pushing in the tip before thrusting harshly forward, completely sheathing himself in you.

A low groan came from both of your chests, the sound echoing through the spacious room. Kylo hunched his body over yours, throwing your legs around his waist. One hand gripped your left thigh while the other held your waist, anchoring you to the desk. He buried his head in your neck, pressing open mouthed kisses along the column of it.

“Fuck, darling,” he grunted as he pulled out all the way before slamming back into you, the desk moving at the sheer force of it. “I’ll never get over how tight you are.” He moved his head and pulled up into a hot, searing kiss, his tongue delving into and exploring your mouth.

His hips set a firm, rough pace, causing you to continuously moan as he repeatedly hit your g-spot. He broke your passionate kiss, kissing both your cheeks, your jaw and your neck. “You’re so fucking _tight_ , darling…gripping my cock so good…this is all I’ve thought about for a year, fucking my fist raw to the thought of you wet, hot _cunt!_ ” Another extra hard thrust came from him.

“I’ve missed your big cock, Kylo…holy shit…only you can make me feel this good! Please, please rub my clit! I’m so close, fuck please Kylo!” you whimpered beneath him, your hands finding purchase on his biceps. You moaned at the sight of Kylo above you, still clothed, apart from the jacket he had shrugged off at some point, relentlessly pounding into you.

He brought his thumb up to your mouth, pushing it past your lips, a silent plea to suck. You did, rolling your tongue around his thumb, sucking as if it were his cock. “Dirty girl…” he mumbled as he pulled his thumb from your mouth with a _pop_. He immediately pressed it to your clit, rubbing the hard, stiff nub in frantic circles, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. Your moans began to get louder and louder, completely forgetting you were still in public. “As much as I’d love to hear you _screaming_ my name, darling, you need to be quiet,” he told you, his thumb and his hips snapping into you, never relenting.

All you could do was nod and bite you lip as you felt that delicious knot inside you tightening, your cunt clenching around Kylo as you reached your peak. “Cum for me, darling.”

That was all you needed. The knot inside you snapped, shockwaves overtaking you body as you eyes slammed shut, mouth falling open in silent euphoria. You perfectly manicured nails dig into the hardened muscle of Kylo’s biceps, leaving crescent shaped marks.

Kylo fucked you through your orgasm, his hips stuttering as he chased his relief. “Fuck darling, I’m going to cum in your tight little cunt, fill you up okay?”

Completely dazed, you still nodded your head knowing that your coil was sitting nicely, preventing any unwanted pregnancies.

You felt Kylo’s arms wrap entirely around you waist and back, holding you so close to his body as he came, grunting and groaning into your neck. His hot cum practically painting your walls, completely filling your to the brim with his cum.

His plush lips pressed kisses all over your body, anywhere that he would reach as he remained inside you, softening slowly. He whispered your name repeatedly, his hands caressing your back as you both came down from your high.

It was there, in that exact moment, Kylo’s softening cock still inside of you, that you realised what you had done.

Guilt washed over you instantly and tears filled your eyes. You blinked them away, hoping Kylo wouldn’t see.

It was just a one time thing, you told yourself, it’ll never happen again.

Finally, Kylo removed himself from you. You felt some of his cum trickle out of you and onto the desk below, some of it even making its way to the hardwood floor.

Without saying a word, you grabbed your underwear and dress, throwing both items on as quickly as you could. You didn’t even look at him. You felt dirty. Sure, you didn’t love Oliver, but that doesn’t make what you just did any better.

You tried to quickly leave, trying to salvage the last bit of dignity you had left. “Hey.” Kylo’s hand stopped you, wrapping gently around your wrist. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Seriously? You’re asking me what’s wrong?” You felt the anger rising. You knew you didn’t say no, you were a willing participant, but you at least had some remorse for what just took place. “We are both engaged, Kylo. To other people, unless you’ve forgotten! What we did was wrong,” you told him, trying to escape from his grasp.

“Don’t act all innocent now,” he snapped as a mixture of confusion and anger made its way on to his face. “You had plenty of chances to say no, to stop it going any further. Don’t blame this all on me!”

“I know what I did Kylo, but it was wrong! This can’t happen again.” You held you ground. “I’m not going to say anything okay? Let’s just go back to the party and pretend this didn’t happen. It’s better that way.”

Sighing and admitting defeat, Kylo released your wrist, his jaw clenching as his mouth formed a straight line. “Fine, whatever you want.”

You nodded before turning you back, unlocking the door and returning to the party. Your breath was heavy as you walked through the corridor and back to the party.

Of all the things that could have happened tonight, you certainly weren’t expecting that.


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four**

A week had passed since the party, a whole week since Kylo had fucked you on his Dad’s desk. No amount of showering could wash away the sin and disgust you felt at yourself. You were angry at yourself; you’d given in to the man who had stomped on your heart in front of friends and family. You’d given in, barely even putting up a fight.

And yet you couldn’t stop thinking about it. About the way he hands caressed your entire body, smoothing over your thighs, hips, ribs and breasts. You couldn’t stop thinking about how his soft, pillowy lips felt against yours, how his breath fanned over your cheek as he grunted, groaned and moaned above you. You couldn’t stop thinking about his words, what he had told you on the balcony and in his dad’s office. 

_“Do you want me to tell you it’s you that I think of every time I close my eyes?”_

_“…this is all I’ve thought about for a year, fucking my fist raw to the thought of you wet, hot cunt!”_

You knew you had to stop. Both of you were engaged to different people, _good_ people. Good people were hard to come by in your line of work. 

“Oh darling.” Your mother’s voice broke through your internal struggle. Your head snapped up, looking towards her. You were sat down for breakfast, everyone eating while you pushed your toast around your plate. “The Solo’s will be over at lunch time, business matters.” She told you. 

You stiffened in your seat. Thankfully, Oliver was still asleep in bed, a nine o’clock start seemingly too early for him. “And by Solo’s you mean…”

“Yes, Ben will be there too.” Your heart raced. You hadn’t told a soul about what happened that night, not even your sister. “And Rey too.”

“That’s okay,” you managed to stain out, clearing your throat as you shifted in your seat. “I’ll just stay out of the way, probably in my room.”

“That’s the thing,” your Dad spoke up this time. “They want you there. They want you back in the business, sweetheart. They want you back working with Kylo.”

Your heart dropped to your stomach. “What?” you all but gasped.

“The Hutts have been causing problems, Jabba’s been sending some of his guys onto Resistance and First Order patches, threatening the people we keep safe. People are getting restless.”

“So where do I fit into this? Why does it have to be me? Can’t someone else do it? What about Rey? She’s Kylo’s fucking fiancée, surely she should be the one starting to take a stand.” Your parents sighed, looking at one another to try and find the right words.

“Rey sees the good in people too much,” your father began. “She’s trying to urge Han, Leia and Ben to make peace with the Hutts.” You scoffed at the idea.

“You can’t make peace with the Hutts, they’d sooner stab you in the back than sign a peace treaty.”

“Which is exactly why they need you back.” It was your mother who spoke this time. Deep down, you knew it was true. You and Kylo had been ruthless back in the day, both of you quickly making your mark, showing that you offered no second chances and you took no prisoners. 

You sighed. “I’ll think about it,” was all you offered. You stood from the breakfast table, needing time to think before the Solo’s arrived.

\-----

Five hours seemingly passed in a blur, the time rapidly ticking down to when you had to make a decision. You knew what you had to choose, of course you did, but it didn’t make the decision any easier.

You had to dress for the occasion, a ‘business’ meeting was a serious task in your line of work. You decided to pull out your old trusted ‘uniform’, an outfit you hadn’t worn in over a year. A black fitted midi hugged your figure, stopping just below the knee, your arms on display due to the sleeveless cut. Your red-bottomed shoes elongated your legs, allowing you to stand tall and proud. The First Order uniform was simple; pure black. You loved it, it made you feel immensely powerful. You styled your hair simply, so it was off your face, with red lipstick complimenting your skin tone to perfection. The sexy, feminine, winged liner look pulling it all together. A diamond necklace was draped elegantly over your neck, grazing your collarbones due to the sweetheart neckline of your dress. The necklace was paired with diamond drop earrings, your signet ring and finally, your engagement ring.

You stared down at the damned ring, contemplating on whether or not you should wear it. You twisted it, pulled it off and put it back on again and again and again. You sighed loudly, the sound echoing off the walls. It remained in its place on your fourth finger, branding you as a taken woman. Maybe Kylo wouldn’t try anything if he saw you were still wearing your ring. 

The crunching of gravel alerted you to the arrival of the Solo’s, two black Rolls Royce’s pulling up right outside your front door. The first car had Han and Leia, both sat in the backseat, while the second had Kylo and Rey, Kylo having been driving the car. 

You kept looking as the group came together, standing just below your window. Kylo looked up, memorising exactly where your bedroom had been. Your breath hitched; you had always loved him dressed in a black three piece suit. He ran a hand through his hair, a slight smirk on his face as he slowly dragged his eyes away from you and to the large black front door in front of him.

“Bastard…” you whispered to yourself with a smile on your lips. You quickly snapped out of it, turning away from the window. 

You had told yourself, and you had told Kylo that what happened last week should never have happened and would never happen again.

But seeing him standing there, hands running through his hair. Those hands that had brought you to the brink of pleasure countless times. Those hands that caressed you and held you tenderly in his arms. You had to stop, had to stop thinking about him. You simply had a job to do, and that’s all you were going to do. You were not going to be the other woman.

\-----

“So what do you say?” Leia finally asked you, her big speech to try and get you back in with both the First Order and the Resistance finally over. Your job was to be easy, the people that both gangs protected trusted you. You were, after all, a woman of your word. All they needed was you to say to these people that they were still protected, despite what the Hutts were threatening. 

The Hutts were people that couldn’t be trusted. Most gangs, sooner or later, could be bought off or a peace treaty could be signed. Both the Resistance and the First Order were elite gangs, having formed almost centuries ago. Newer gangs, such as the Fetts and even Crimson Dawn buckled under the intense pressure and ruthlessness of the gangs. But the Hutts seemed to be one gang that just would not fall in line. They had, throughout the years, repeatedly tried to topple the gangs, wanting to take their place. But every time, they were outmanned, outgunned and outsmarted. Still it didn’t stop them trying.

“Sure, I just tell these people that their businesses are safe, that they won’t get hurt and that nothing will harm their families, I can do that,” you told Leia, a smile breaking out on her face. “But,” the smile quickly fell. “I want to hear a long term strategy for dealing with the Hutts. You need to take out Jabba. I know we’ve all tried over the years, but the slimy bastard keeps getting away. You can keep reassuring people that they’re going to be safe, but one day they won’t and that will shatter all the trust we’ve built with them.” 

All eyes from around the table stared at you. Han cleared his throat, shuffling awkwardly in his seat as he sat across from you. Leia sat on his left, Rey on his right. Your mother and father filled the two seats between yourself and Leia and Kylo, he had chosen to sit right next to you. 

You could smell his cologne from where you were sat, you recognised it. It was one you had bought for him, a smell that you loved on him so much, a smell that made you snuggle just that little bit closer to him after he had fucked you into his mattress. You kept your face neutral, not letting him know the effect he was having on you. His eyes bore into the side of your face, but you kept your eyes trained on Han and Leia.

You sighed, head hanging forward for just a moment. “Look I don’t want to be difficult, but we need a more secure plan than ‘just tell people they’ll be safe’. They need to _know_ that they’re safe, they need to see us doing _something_.”

“Look,” Rey’s voice finally chipped in, her eyes looking at you, a slight patronising smile graced her lips. You remained neutral; despite the fact your insides were beginning to boil with anger. “I understand where you’re coming from, I really do.” There was the patronising tone to match the smile. “But I still think peace is the way to go! Look how many other smaller gangs have agreed to peace with us over the past year. Obviously you wouldn’t know anything about that since you practically ran away…” she trailed off.

You could see Kylo shift uncomfortably beside you and your parents shared a knowing look between them. “I don’t mean any disrespect, but maybe you should just listen to what we have to say. You have been out of the loop.”

The air practically froze over from the tension. You gaze hardened as you looked at Rey, a smile still on her lips. It wasn’t a kind smile that you had grown up with, this was different. It was almost cruel, like she thought you were no good, that you were an idiot. You went to open your mouth to retaliate, but you were beaten to it.

“I agree,” Kylo said, and for a moment you saw red. That was until he said your name, fully turning to face you. You couldn’t help but look at him this time, couldn’t help but gaze into his amber eyes, reeling you in to his orbit. “I think we need to do something more than just _tell_ people we’re going to protect them. The Hutts have been a pain in the ass since you were my age,” Kylo said, quickly shooting a look over to his parents. “I agree with you.”

You felt a swell of pride bloom in your chest, and you smiled. You actually smiled at Kylo. He had sided with you, not Rey, _you_.

Maybe, you thought, maybe he had meant what he said. Maybe he did think of you. But you couldn’t let those thoughts linger in your mind. You had to stop thinking about what Kylo could do to your body, what Kylo could do to your heart. You had to regain control.

You removed the smile from you lips, and just nodded your thanks to him. You didn’t really pay attention to the rest of the meeting, that was more for the benefit of your Dad and Han.

Suddenly, you felt fingers graze your bare knee where your dress had ridden up as you sat down. Knowing what Kylo was trying to do, you slowly moved your leg, trying to hide it from his wandering fingers, but he didn’t let you. His hand gripped behind your knee, keeping it in place as his fingers ran under the black crepe material of your dress, skimming over your thighs. Your breathing became uneven, and your heartrate increased.

You threw a quick glace over at him. His eyes were trained on Han, listening, or at least pretending to listen, to what he was saying. You noticed Rey’s hand resting on Kylo’s forearm, her hand every so often reaching towards his own hand, which he would move away.

You felt dirty, ashamed. His fingers were running over your skin, burning into your flesh while his fiancée sat there, trying to get him to show her any kind of affection. You felt sorry for Rey, you really did. She was like Oliver in that sense, stuck in a relationship that wasn’t going anywhere. The only difference being Oliver knew he wasn’t going to be getting a proper marriage, you doubted Rey knew that about her marriage.

Your breath hitched as Kylo dug his nails into your flesh, gripping your thigh before smoothing over the area. Your hand fell to your lap, gripping his hand in yours, a silent plea to stop. You threw a quick glace at him, not wanting to linger in case anyone noticed. You could see him sigh heavily, his hand moving away from your thigh and resting on his own. You breathed a small sigh of relief, finally returning back to the conversation at hand.

\-----

The meeting had ended after what seemed like hours. Kylo had repeatedly snuck his hand towards your thigh during the meeting, teasing you throughout. He’d even been brazen enough to let his fingertips graze the edge of your panties.

You couldn’t believe he would try something like that, especially since his fiancée was sat right next to him, clinging onto his damn arm as if her life defended on it. You couldn’t believe he would pull a stunt like that, even after telling him that you didn’t want to see him again.

You were angry. You were ashamed.

But even worse, you were completely aroused.

There was something so exhilarating, something so taboo about Kylo’s hands grazing your thigh, caressing your skin, showering you in attention while his soon-to-be wife tried so hard to beg for the same attention. After Rey’s snide outburst at you, you weren’t feeling so sorry for her anymore.

You realised then, that maybe, just maybe, Kylo had been telling the truth. Maybe he hadn’t stopping thinking about you for that entire year. Maybe you filled his head just as much as he filled yours.

You found yourself wanting to gravitate towards him, you wanted to stay with him for just that bit longer. You didn’t want him to leave, didn’t want him to leave you alone in a huge mansion with a fiancé you didn’t love. You wanted him. You wanted Kylo.

The sound of your name being called broke you from your sudden realisation. Your parents were looking at you, waiting for a response. “Sorry, I was off in my own world. What did you say?”

“We were just saying you and Ben can make use of the library to talk while the rest of us have tea on the veranda. Rey’s going to head back to the city so you and Kylo can talk about the logistics of you returning to work.”

It looked like your prayers had been answered. The library in your house was situated on the middle floor at the front of the house, the complete other end of the veranda. You looked over to Kylo, a small smirk playing on his face as he remembered the house’s layout. “Lead the way,” his deep voice sounded, his voice ringing in your ears. You bid your goodbyes to everyone, before turning and leaving with Kylo. You made sure to memorise the longing look Rey gave Kylo as you left.

\-----

Your heels clicked on the marble floors, Kylo’s footsteps echoing behind you. Neither of you had said a word, Kylo just followed you obediently, walking a few paces behind you. You swung the door to the library open, leaving it open wide for Kylo to follow you in. You kept your back to him, staring out of the window and onto the vast gardens of the estate.

The locking of the library door caused your stomach to drop in anticipation, your legs slightly trembling as Kylo walked towards you. His body completely surrounded yours as he stood behind you, his fingers gently running up and down the length of your forearms.

“I thought I told you we couldn’t fuck one another again.” Your voice was barely above a whisper.

“You did,” he responded, his mouth right by your ear, his breath tickling your cheek. “But I don’t see you stopping me.”

“I could stop you if I wanted to.”

“Do you want me to stop?”

He grabbed your waist, turning your body to face him, chests pressed together so tightly that no air could pass through them. “Say it, tell me to stop and I will. I’ll leave you alone, we’ll both get married and we’ll live out the rest of our lives as business partners, and nothing more.” His voice was low and even, so controlled. “But, if you let me have you, I’ll never stop. I’ll keep coming back for more, I’ll find a way to leave Rey and get you out of your engagement. I’ll make you mine, darling. I was a fool before, you’re the one that I _want_ , you’re the one that I _need_. Say yes, and I’ll be yours.”

Your eyes bore in to his, finding any sign that he didn’t mean it, that it was just words he didn’t mean, that he was only saying this to fuck you.

You couldn’t find anything that convinced you he was lying.

“Do you promise?” Your voice was so quiet, it was like you hadn’t say anything. But Kylo heard you. He would always hear you. “Do you promise that I’ll be yours and that you’ll be mine?”

“I promise, darling.”

Without waiting, you leaned up and crashed your lips to his, hands automatically coming up to cup the sides of his face. “Then I’m yours,” you whispered against his lips breathlessly. He groaned, his hands roaming all over your body, wanting to feel you, to touch you, to _have you_. Nothing and no-one could stop either of you now.

Your lips danced together, memorising every single centimetre of each other. It was slow and sweet, yet fast and primal. It was everything all at once. You had never felt anything like it before, not even all those years ago when you two fucked for fun. You had fallen so deeply in love with him, but you didn’t know he felt the same way. But now you do, now you know he loves you just as much as you love him.

And it was _divine_.

Kylo’s arms wound themselves tighter around your body, holding you so close, scared that if he let up on his grip you would disappear, that it would all have been a dream. But you were there, and you weren’t leaving any time soon.

His hands moved to grip your thighs, hoisting you up into his arms and walking back until he pressed you up against one of the bookshelves. A primal urge overtook both of you, you didn’t have long. You couldn’t savour one another like you normally did, there was no time for that. But you both needed to feel one another.

Your legs wrapped around his waist, hips bucking onto the hardness confined behind his black trousers. You moaned at the friction, your panties growing wetter and wetter by the second as Kylo’s lips travelled down the column of your neck, kissing and sucking as he went.

You didn’t care about marks, not in that moment. You would wear them gladly, parade them around for everyone to see. One hand moved from the back of your thigh, coming round to the front to hike up your dress, letting it pool around your waist.

His fingers were on you instantly, rubbing over the wet lace. Kylo growled against your throat. “Filthy girl, you’re dripping for me,” he taunted. You could feel his smirk against your neck, his breath hot and heavy as he panted. His hips were moving in tandem with the hand that was rubbing you, his concealed cock rutting against your thigh.

“Only for you, Kylo,” you moaned breathlessly as his fingers circled your clit over your panties. You keened under the pressure, your head rolling back against the bookshelf, giving Kylo more of your neck to mark up. “Please…we don’t have long…I need to feel you, darling,” you begged him. You didn’t want to wait any longer, you needed to have him inside you.

“Since you asked so nicely.” He quickly undid his belt and trousers, pushing them part way down his thigh along with boxers. He stroked himself a couple of times before lining up with your entrance. He wasted no time, pushing inside you, completely bottoming out.

Groans of pleasure filled the enormous room, heavy panting following. Kylo pressed sweet kisses to your cheeks, his hands now firmly placed on your lower back, keeping you pressed up against him.

“You feel like heaven, darling. I’ll never want anyone else but you,” he moaned as he started thrust in and out of you, deep and strategic thrusts. There was nothing rough and primal about it, it was slow, passionate and controlled. You both wanted to memorise every ridge, every flutter, every stroke.

Your walls clenched around Kylo’s cock every time he hit your sweet spot, bringing you closer and closer to the edge. There was no dirty talk like normal, no loud and over-the-top moans, just heavy breathing and lustful pants. “Just like that, darling…oh please keep doing that,” you whined into Kylo’s ear just as his finger came down to rub your clit in time with his thrusts. “That’s perfect…so perfect…you’re perfect, Kylo. God, I love you.” Your grip on his shoulders tightened, bringing his face closer into your neck. You buried your face in his hair, smelling the faith smell of his shampoo.

“I love you, darling. I should have told you that sooner. I love you; I always have and always will. Cum for me, darling. Please, I need you to cum for me.”

Your body tense and then relaxed, one of the most powerful orgasms you ever had washing over you. You shook in his arms, your pussy clenching around him, pulling his own orgasm from him. His cum painted your walls, completely filling you up.

Moans and groans filled the room as you both rode out your orgasms. You smoothed over Kylo’s hair, fingers running through the locks that had become slightly sweaty during your tryst. You clung onto one another, just holding each other, hands running over every inch of your bodies. Kylo’s head lifted from your neck and brought your lips to his in a sweet kiss. “I meant it, darling,” he whispered, eyes looking directly into yours. “I’ve always loved you.”

You smiled, tears of happiness in your eyes. You brushed your thumbs over his cheeks, your left thumb brushing over the healed scar that decorated his face. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to say that, Kylo,” you chuckled, bringing him in for another kiss. “I love you too, they’ll never be anyone but you. I only want you.”

You stayed like that for a few moments longer, just holding onto one another, revelling in the feeling of being able to be with one another. You knew it wouldn’t always be like this, you had to keep your affair secret. But when it was just you two, you two were the only people in the world, the only two people that mattered.

And for now, that would be enough.


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry for the slow update, I've been in a bit of a slump but I'm getting through it! Thank you for all the kudos and comments you've been leaving, it really means a lot to me! This chapter is sort of a filler, but begins to get up what's to come. Hope you all enjoy!

**Chapter Five**

Not much had changed in the First Order syndicate, or the Resistance for that matter, since you had been away. The only thing that had changed, really, were the people who sat around the table discussing business. Han and Leia still came to the meetings, but they took more of a backseat, allowing Kylo to take the forefront. 

The small back room of the restaurant that Han owned made the perfect place to hold meetings. Front of house dealt in the legal side of the business, while the back happened to host the illegal side of everything. The police never caught on, but it did help to have the vast majority of the police force in your pocket.

“It’s good to see you back here again,” Poe chimed towards you as you sat opposite him. You were finally back where you belonged, right beside Kylo. Your status as his right-hand woman was reinstated almost instantly. It was where you belonged. 

You smiled brightly at Poe. It was a smile so bright that it managed to reach your eyes, the sides crinkling ever so slightly. “I won’t lie Poe, it’s great to be back.”

“Yes, just what we need. More members of the First Order,” Rey sneered, taking her seat on the other side of Kylo. The tension in the air hardened. Poe, Finn and Rose all shuffled awkwardly in their seats, clearly not used to Rey’s outbursts of irritation. These snide outbursts must be a new thing, you thought to yourself. 

Your back straightened in your chair. You decided, for once, to take the high ground, not letting Rey’s sharp words bother you. “Good to be back alongside you two,” you commented to Phasma and Hux, both of whom sat to the right of you. 

“It certainly hasn’t been the same without you.”

Another sound came from the left hand side of Kylo, a scoff from Rey. She sat with her arms folded, a slight pout on her face as she shot daggers at you. You finally turned to raise your eyebrow at her. “Something to say Rey? Finally decided to grow a backbone?”

You noticed Kylo’s lips formed into a quirk smirk at your words, just briefly, just quick enough for you to see. “Both of you, pack it in,” he gruff voice declared with irritation. He was right, there were bigger things at hand than Rey’s snide remarks. You apologised to Kylo, letting him start the meeting.

“As we know, the Hutts have been causing problems the last couple of months, threatening people in our areas, people we promise we’d protect. They’re becoming restless, their livelihoods are at stake and so are their families,” Kylo began, leaning back in his chair, oozing authority, charm and dominance. 

You couldn’t help but roam your eyes over his physique, how his white shirt clung to his broad chests, the buttons fighting hard to stay put. The black jacket sat perfectly across his large shoulders, and the black trousers fitted in all the right places. You quickly snapped out of it, not wanting to draw attention to the fact you were gawking at your lover in front of his fiancée. 

“I still don’t get why we always have to resort to violence,” Rey spoke, interrupting Kylo mid-speech. All eyes quickly turned to her, shocked that she dared to interrupt Kylo. Han and Leia shared looks between each other, your own father even shuffled awkwardly in his seat. It was disrespectful, even if she was engaged to him. 

Kylo’s face said it all. He was shooting hard daggers at her, his jaw clenched in anger. “I hadn’t finished, Rey,” Kylo all but growled. “Interrupt me again, and you’re out.” 

Rey’s mouth gaped like a fish, taken aback by Kylo’s harsh punishment. She nodded her head, slowly sinking into her seat. She looked like a scolded child, her body practically caving in on itself as she tried to make herself look as small as possible. 

“As I was saying,” Kylo continued tearing his eyes away from Rey. “We not only need to tell our people that they’re safe, we need to _show_ them too.” Kylo sat forward in his chair, leaning his forearms against the table and clasping his hands together. He turned his gaze to you and said your name, “that’s where you come in.” He nodded for you to take over, explaining what needs to happen.

“Well, I haven’t quite worked out the logistics yet, but we need to be ballsy with the Hutts. Take no prisoners. Sure, that's worked in the past for other gangs that are bigger than the Hutts, but the Hutts are far more ruthless. There’s a reason why no-one has made a peace treaty with them since the failed treaty between them and the Ackbar gang, we all know how that ended; in a bloodbath which resulted in not just the complete obliteration of the Ackbar’s but also the deaths of other people, innocent people.

“You can’t trust the Hutts, so we have to be tactical. We have to get to the root, and destroy it.”

“You’re not suggesting what I think you’re suggesting are you?” Rose spoke up, her eyes widening at the realisation of your words.

“Yeah, I am suggesting it. I’m suggesting we take down Jabba, once and for all.”

A deadly silence fell over the room. It was a bold plan, even for you. But it was time to take a stand against the Hutts. “They’re the only group who won’t ever fall into line, and without Jabba the rest of the clan will just disintegrate,” you tried explaining as calmly as you could. “If we don’t want innocent people to get caught in the crossfire, it’s the only option we’ve got.”

Everyone was quiet for a minute, taking in what you had propositioned. The longer the silence went on, the more anxious you became. Maybe your plan was too far fetched, too risky at this moment in time. Maybe you were over-reaching yourself, overestimating your abilities. Then finally, _finally_ , someone spoke.

“I like it.” It was Finn. Your head snapped in his direction as a soft smile began to form on your face. “The Hutts are the only ones we haven’t been able to control, or at least get them to stay away. It’s about time we all took a stand against them.”

“Come on Finn, you don’t actually believe that do you?” Rey snapped, clearly not enjoying the fact people were listening to you, rather than her. “I thought you were smart, clearly not.”

“There’s no need to be like that Rey, just because your plan is crap,” Phasma quickly jumped in. Not much was certain at this point, everything up in the air. But one thing was for certain, and that was Phasma’s hatred of Rey. Ever since that night when she sliced Kylo’s face in half, Phasma had harboured a deep hatred for her. Any chance to put Rey in her place, Phasma would take the opportunity.

“It’s not crap! It’s logical! That way, no-one gets hurt. _Your_ plan,” Rey growled, jabbing her index finger at you, “will end in a bloodbath! God knows how many of us could die-”

“And just think how much more _will_ die if we _don’t_ do anything!” It was your turn to interrupt, not your smartest move but Kylo didn’t stop you. He sat back, listening intently to every argument put forward, most of them being in favour of your plan. 

The arguing seemed to go on for ages, with mainly Rey snapping at everyone who disagreed with her. She threw nasty insults to people, calling Rose a “spineless bitch who always took the easy way out of things.” 

“I think you need to calm down Rey,” you said calmly. That was your warning to people. If you were overly calm, all hell could break loose at any second.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do. You disappeared for a year, and then you waltz back in here like you own the damn place! You betrayed all of us, and you didn’t even apologise.”

“I stand by my actions Rey, do you stand by yours?” 

The room went deathly silent, all eyes gawking at the two of you. Your eyes were locked onto Rey’s, cold, harsh and unwavering. Her fists clenched in her hands, her breathing increased. She huffed and puffed as she glared at you, but you sat there, unwavering. Nothing could phase you.

Kylo cleared his throat, breaking the deadly silence. Your eyes quickly flicked to his, causing them to soften as you gazed into his bright, brown eyes. He looked at you sympathetically, giving you a silent reassurance that you were okay. “I think that’s enough for today,” Kylo finally said, standing up from his seat. Everyone followed in quick succession. 

You watched as Rey tried to reach out for Kylo’s hand, only for him to move it away, a silent warning to her to not push her luck. 

Everyone shuffled out of the room, pouring into the main restaurant where a few patrons sat enjoying their mid-afternoon breaks. You felt someone come up beside you, nudging your shoulder slightly. You looked to your left and saw him, concern written over his face.

“You’re playing with fire, y’know,” Finn whispered in your ear as you exited the room side by side. Your heart rate increased slightly. Did he know? Had you and Kylo not been discrete enough? “Don’t worry, you weren’t too conspicuous, but I know that look you both had.” You calmed down slightly. “Look, we all know what happened in the past between you two, but things are different now. There’s bigger things at stake here.” 

You both stopped in the entrance of the restaurant, out of earshot of everyone else. You turned to face him with a soft smile. “I don’t know what you mean, Finn.” While your mouth said the words, your eyes told a different story. They told Finn that you knew what he was talking about, and you knew it was dangerous. But you loved Kylo, and you weren’t letting him go.

He sucked in a deep breath, seemingly understanding you. A soft and defeated smile played on Finn’s lips. “Right...I got you. But I need you to know one thing. I don’t know if he was going to tell you himself but I need to make sure you know.”

You furrowed your brows, concern plastered across your face. “What is it?”

“They’ve officially set a date, five months from now, just in time for Christmas.” 

You didn’t react, not outwardly anyway. Inside though, your stomach was churning and your heart was racing at what seemed like a thousand beats per minute. But still, all you did was smile softly at Finn and thank you for telling you.

You two briefly hugged before parting ways, Finn leaving you to gather your thoughts. Just as you were about to set foot outside of the restaurant, a feminine voice called out your name. You turned on your heels, spotting Rey heading your way, determination in every single step she took towards you. “Can I have a word?” she asked, not even letting you reply before she was dragging you to a secluded corner. 

She was the last person you wanted to see, or even talk to. “You embarrassed me in there!” she hissed under her breath, her face coming level with yours.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes. “Please, you embarrassed yourself. Maybe if you listened every once in a while and _didn’t_ insult your employees, people would be more inclined to listen to you.”

She quickly changed the subject. “I don’t trust you. Like I said in there, you don’t just get to waltz back in here and pretend the last year didn’t happen. _I_ was the one who stepped up to the plate while you were gone, _I_ kept things in check, _I_ looked after Ben while you were gone.”

You wanted to scream at her. You took a deep breath, controlling your emotions. “I was gone for a year, but you weren’t there before then. _I was_ . You weren’t the one who had to sew him back together,” you spat, your voice low and domineering. “Don’t you dare try and tell me that you know Kylo better than I do. You know _nothing_. Maybe you should pay more attention to your fiancé and stop throwing your toys out of the pram when things don’t go your way.”

You quickly turned on your heels, not wanting to spend another second with her. You needed to clear your head, needed to process the fact that you only had five months left with Kylo. Sure, it seemed like a long time now, but five months is barely anything, not when the life you lead moves at a thousand miles per hour. You needed to speak to him, you had to know what was going on, you refused to be ambushed like last time. 


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another update?! Shocking I know! This chapter had been in the works for a little while, and I sort of had to work the last chapter around it. 
> 
> This chapter is just pure smut with a little plot at the beginning, hope you enjoy!

**Chapter Six**

_ Come to my apartment. 8 o’clock.  _

You re-read that message several times, making sure it was actually from Kylo. Sure you’d only been having an affair for a short while, but he hadn’t invited you back to his yet. It was far too risky. Rey lived with him, shared his bed with him. You couldn’t help but wonder if he fucked her too. You pushed those thoughts from your mind, typing back a reply.

_ Is it a special occasion? _

You didn’t have to wait long before those three dots appeared in the bottom left hand corner, indicating Kylo was replying.

_ Yes it is. Wear something for it. _

You smirked to yourself. You shouldn’t feel proud of doing this, but you were. 

However, Finn’s words from just a few hours ago played on your mind still. You knew the day was coming, the day when Kylo and Rey were finally going to get married, but you still had been shocked to find out they had set the date. You tried to remember all what he said to you, the promises that he made. He loved you, he had told you just as much. 

You had to stop overthinking everything, you knew that one way or another, Kylo would keep his promise to you. You checked the time on your phone. 18:48. At least you had a few hours to prepare what you were going to say to Kylo.

\-----

By 7:59 you were outside Kylo’s penthouse apartment, hand raised to knock on the door. 

Before your knuckles even touched the door, it was flung open, revealing a slightly dishevelled Kylo to you. His hair wasn’t as neat as it always was and his tie hung loosely around his neck. A tumbler adorned his right hand, golden liquid floating in it. “Right on time,” he muttered, leaving the door open for you as he turned and walked back to the living room, completely downing the whiskey that he had in the glass. 

You quickly followed him inside, shutting the door behind you before following him into the living room. Kylo headed over to the makeshift bar in his living room, pouring himself another large glass of whiskey. “Can I get you a drink?” 

“I’ll have a white wine, since you’re offering.” You removed your coat, revealing your simple Dolce and Gabbana sweetheart-neck midi dress, the dress you had been wearing earlier at the meeting. It was paired with your classic black So Kate Christian Louboutin suede heels. 

You took in his body language from behind the bar. He kept his eyes downcast, concentrating on pouring your respective drinks. He placed your wine glass on the bartop with more force than necessary. His jaw was clenched tightly, it looked like he could break his teeth at any minute. His crisp white shirt was slightly crinkled, and the arms were rolled up, revealing his forearms. You noticed his jacket had been thrown over the back of the black grandfather chair in the living room. 

He finally pushed your wine glass towards you, without uttering a word. “Thank you.” He grumbled an incoherent response as he took at another swig of his drink. You quickly took a sip of your wine. “So, were you going to tell me you and Rey finally set a wedding date or was I going to be ambushed like I was when you got engaged?”

Kylo finally looked at you, his head snapping up so quickly he could have given himself whiplash. For a moment his eyes looked frenzied, angry. Angry that you would dare mention her name while the two of you were alone. But that moment was soon gone. His eyes softened as they roamed over your face, taking in your features. His shoulders visibly slumped as he took in all of you.

“It wasn’t my idea,” he finally muttered. You didn’t say anything back, you waited. You wanted him to tell you himself, not have you force it out of him. 

He sighed heavily. He walked over to the grandfather chair where his jacket lay over the back, slumping down into the seat. You sat opposite him, nestled on the large leather sofa. You looked at him. You could practically hear his brain running at a thousand miles per hour, trying to find the best way to explain everything to you. 

“I was going to tell you. It’s one of the reasons I invited you over in fact,” he started. He leant forward, his elbows resting on his knees, eyes downcast to look at the hardwood floor. “I wasn’t going to leave you in the dark like before, I knew I hurt you back then and I couldn’t stand to do it again.”

You kept your eyes trained on him, your face emotionless. But inside it was like a hurricane was racking through your body, emotions being thrown this way and that. You were so conflicted. On one hand, you were thankfully he was telling you in advance, but that still didn’t change the fact that he was still going ahead with the marriage, despite telling you he’d find a way out of it. 

“I need you to know that I still don’t want to marry her, and I’m still trying to find a way to get out of it. I just…” he trailed off. He ran a hand through his hair, tugging slightly at the ends in frustration. He finally looked at you. You could see so much conflict within him, even after all these years. “Mom, Dad and Luke held a private meeting yesterday, just those three and myself and Rey. They told us we’d been engaged for a year now, everything was basically planned because of Rey but we still had no wedding date. They told us they had set the date for us. Apparently I’m getting married Christmas Eve.” 

He placed his drink on the coffee table that sat between the two of you before standing up and walking over to you, dropping to his knees in front of you. He took your hands in his, peppering them with kisses before tugging at your waist, pulling you closer to his body. Your arms settled around his neck, holding him just as tight as he was holding you. “I meant what I said. I don’t want to marry her, I love  _ you.  _ I’m trying darling, you have to believe me.” 

You did. To be honest, how could you not? You were in the exact same position, and it wouldn't be much longer before your own parents were deciding when you needed to get married. “I believe you,” you whispered as you cupped his face in both your hands. “Sorry for ambushing you.”

“I deserved it, I should have told you sooner, sooner than tonight.”

There was something that was still niggling at the back of your mind. “How did Finn know? He’s the one that told me just after the meeting.”

Kylo sighed heavily again, his forehead dropping to your lap for a few moments. “Fucking  _ Rey _ . She saw him as we left the office and told him straight away. I scolded her, told her to not tell anyone until the official announcement next week. It pissed me off, because all I wanted to do was to tell you first, I didn’t want you to hear it from anyone but me. Look how well that turned out.”

You ran your hands through his hair, massaging him and hopefully, easing away the tension. “I was mad, I won’t lie. I thought I was thrown back to last year again,” you chuckled softly, trying to lighten the mood. “But now you’ve told me, I’m not mad anymore. Just upset that this is becoming a reality quicker than I thought it would.”

Kylo’s arms tightened around your waist even more, holding you impossibly close to him. He peppered kisses along your covered thighs and stomach, the easiest to reach places from where he was knelt on the floor. 

Kylo knelt up higher, so he was finally face to face with you. He leaned in, pressing his lips gently against yours, giving you the sweetest of kisses. He tasted like the whiskey he had been drinking. You loved it. You moaned softly as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding across yours expertly. Slowly, you broke away from him, peppering a few kisses to his lips before completely breaking away from him. “Where’s Rey?” you asked softly, looking around the vast space of his penthouse.

“Celebrating,” Kylo scoffed. “Took Phasma and Rose out for drinks, a bachelorette party of sorts.”

“What? And I didn’t get an invite?” you teased, earning a soft chuckle from Kylo.

“I saw she dragged you away earlier.” Kylo moved from his position on the floor to sit next to you on the sofa, his body turned to face yours. His arm draped over the back of the sofa behind you as you shuffled closer to him. “What did she want?”

“Just to tell me she doesn’t trust me, how she took care of  _ everything _ while I was gone, including you.” Kylo let out a huff of annoyance, his eyes rolling at the thought of Rey looking after him. “Did you fuck her while I was gone?”

His eyes snapped towards you, his mouth hanging slightly open at the bluntness of your questions. “It’s a simple enough question, Kylo.” A small smirk played on your face. Kylo cleared his throat, trying to find the right words.

“Yes, but not for long.” He looked you in the eye, not avoiding your gaze for even a second. “After you left, and I realised you weren’t coming back, I was just so mad and angry and confused. I missed you and you were just gone.” He inched closer towards you, your thighs pressing against one another. His arm slid around your waist, tugging your body closer to his. “I think she thought it was more than sex, but it wasn’t, not to me. I missed you, I wanted you back but you weren’t there. The novelty of it all wore off pretty quickly. She just wasn’t you. The last time I actually slept with her was about four months ago, I’ve managed to avoid her advances.” 

You chuckled slightly, the image of Kylo pushing Rey off him so he didn’t have to have sex with her running through your mind. “Thank you for telling me.” You brushed a sweet kiss to his lips, before pulling away, biting your bottom lip. “So, you said Rey was having her bachelorette party? Does that technically mean this is your bachelor party?” 

Kylo’s eyes darkened and his breath hitched as he took in the positively sinful look you were giving him. He knew you were wearing  _ something _ underneath your dress, like he had asked you to, but what he didn’t know. 

You quickly stood, pushing the coffee table back to give you room. Kylo maneuvered his body so he sat in the middle of the sofa, arms sprawled out against the back, his legs wide. “I guess it would be, although I have no-one else at my  _ party _ .”

“Then think of this as a private show.” 

You reached your hands to your hair, releasing it from the confines of the ponytail you’d put it in this morning. You let your hair fall, using your hands to shake out the kinks from the hairband. Kylo watched you intently, the way your hips moved sensually, even though there was no music. The way your hands ran over your body, caressing your hips, stomach and breasts, teasing him relentlessly. 

You reached behind you to slowly pull down the zipper of the dress. You slid your arms out, letting the fabric pool at your waist, showing off your black lace plunge bra. The plunge aspect accentuated your cleavage, and the sheer lace showed off your nipples, which were already hardened from your arousal and the cold air. 

Your eyes dropped to Kylo and the bulge that was forming behind his trousers. He noticed you staring and gripped himself over the fabric, groaning at the sensation. “See what you fucking do to me?” he taunted, palming his growing erection. 

“If you keep touching yourself, I’ll stop.” You wanted the control, even if it was just for a few moments. He teased you so many times, kept your squirming underneath him, now it was your turn to watch him squirm. He gritted his teeth, but nonetheless, dropped his hands and placed them back on the back of the sofa.

You smirked, and pushed your dress over your hips, swaying them seductively as the fabric fell over them. The black material pooled at your feet, and you kicked it to the side, leaving you stood before him. Kylo audibly groaned at the sight of you. Your bra was paired with a matching garter belt and suspenders, and a matching thong which barely covered you. Your sheer black tights were attached to the garter and suspenders, decorating your legs. You’d kept your heels on, elongating your legs even further. 

Kylo was practically salivating in his seat, his eyes unsure where to look. His hands clenched into fists, willing his hands to not touch himself. You smirked as you watched his resolve crumble. All because of some simple lingerie. You ran your hands over your body, squeezing your breasts and teasing your nipples through the sheer lace of the bra. You turned, running your hands over your hips and arse, squeezing your cheeks ever so slightly. You heard him groan, a low and aggressive sound. You bit your lip as you turned back to face him, looking him dead in the eyes. “Like what you see?” 

His dick was practically trying to break free from the confines of his trousers. He was so hard, the fabric completely tented. He kept his jaw shut tightly as he nodded his head frantically. “Use your words,” you taunted as you stepped a fraction closer to him. 

His eyes ran the length of your body, straight from head to toe, “yes,” he managed to groan out. “You look completely delectable.” 

You smiled brightly. You closed the space between the two of you, your hands coming to rest on his shoulders. You leaned down and pressed the quickest of kisses to his lips, your lips barely touching his before you pulled away and turned on the spot, your arse now in his face. You moved your hips, pretending there was music to dance to as you inched lower and lower to his lap. You let your arse brush against the hard length, getting Kylo to emitte a deep, predatory growl as you did. 

You moved off of him in an instant, putting space between the two of you once again. This time, however, he followed. He went to lean forward, went to grab you by the waist and pull you into him. But you were quicker. You held up your heel clad left foot and pressed it to his chest, halting his movements. His eyebrow quirked, but he leaned back into the sofa, allowing your heel to push him back. “You can look, but you can’t touch.”

He whimpered, the great Kylo Ren whimpered beneath you. You giggled, your bottom lip being tugged between your teeth. Even Kylo managed to let you a small chuckle. “You’re going to be the death of me, darling.”

You smirked and leaned down so your face was level with his. This angle gave him a delicious view of your lace clad tits as they pushed forward in your bra. You planted your hands on his thighs, your perfectly manicured nails digging into the hardened muscle ever so slightly. “Not before you fuck me on your soon to be marital bed. I want those sheets  _ smelling _ like me so Rey knows  _ exactly _ who you belong to.”

Kylo snapped. He grabbed the back of your head and yanked you forward, your lips crashing together. The kiss was rough and primal, all teeth and tongue as you both moaned wantonly into one another's mouths. You maneuvered yourself to straddle him, your knees pressing into the leather sofa on either side of his hips. You swivelled and moved your hips, rubbing your lace clad cunt, which was now soaked through, against the tent in his trousers. A growl erupted from Kylo’s chest. His hands flew to your hips, squeezing the flesh in both of his impossibly large hands, no doubt leaving bruises.

His kisses were punishing, his mouth completely devouring yours. You could stay like this forever, completely drowning in the ocean that was Kylo. 

You wound your arms tight around his shoulders, your hands running through his hair, tugging and pulling every so often. Kylo’s right hand left your body, and reached into his pocket. You couldn’t see what he pulled out until you felt something cold against your stocking clad thigh. You gasped, breaking from the kiss to look down at where the cold hit you. 

His switchblade. 

The flat edge of the knife grazed your skin, slowly dragging the cool metal up your thigh. He toyed with the garter belt, running the knife under the lace, pulling the garment slowly from your body. He let the material snap back against your skin, causing you to gasp softly. He continued to run the blade along your body, running it along your hips and torso, his eyes fully concentrated on the blade and the area of skin he was teasing.

He pushed the blade under the small patch of material that held the bra together, teasing both the bra and you. “Is this new?” he asked, eyes still fully concentrated on the blade.

“Yes, and it was expensive.”

“Guess I’d better buy you another one.” Without waiting, he sliced through the material, freeing your breasts to him and letting the bra hang down, the straps still on your shoulder. Just as you were about to scold him, he latched his mouth onto your nipple, licking, sucking, pulling and tugging at the hardened nub. You threw your head back as you moaned loudly, the sound bouncing off the walls of the living room. 

You quickly shrugged off the ruined bra, letting to pool onto the floor in a heap of ruined lace. The clattering sound of metal on the floor brought you back to your senses. You stared down at Kylo, whose lips were still attached to your nipple. “This... _ shit _ ...this wasn’t p-part of the p-plan,” you managed to moan out as Kylo alternated between each nipple.

Kylo kissed a path from your chest to your neck, his lips hovering just over the lobe of your ear. “Then you shouldn’t have spent all that time teasing me, grinding that pretty ass against my hard cock like a little slut. Is that what you are? My little slut? Coming to my apartment, wearing this  _ flimsy _ material.” Emphasising his point, Kylo took hold of your thong in both of his hands, ripping the garment from you. 

Without warning, he plunged two fingers straight into your aching cunt. His fingers met no resistance, that was how wet you were. You both moaned lewdly, you at the pleasure of his fingers inside of you, and Kylo from the arousal that coated his fingers. “You’re fucking  _ drenched _ , leaking all over my fucking trousers. Do you get this wet for every man, or is it just the engaged ones?”

You moaned at his words, cunt fluttering around his fingers, sucking them in deeper. He added a third, causing you to keen in pleasure. “ _ Fuck _ …” you panted out. Your hips began moving in tandem with his fingers, fucking yourself on them. “I-I’m only like this f-for y-you!” 

Your hips picked up their pace as Kylo’s fingers began curling against your g-spot, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. You could feel yourself dripping down your thighs, coating his fingers and trousers. Kylo tutted beneath you. “Dirty girl, fucking soaked for an engaged man. Bet you’re never this wet for that shit fiancé of yours are you? No, of course you’re fucking not.”

“F-fuck, Kylo! Shit, I’m gonna cum! Fuck! Please let me cum, pleasepleaseplease! I can’t take it anymore!” Your voice was pitchy, even whiny, as you begged for him to let you cum. You were so close. The pad of his thumb brushed over your clit, and that was all it took. 

You saw white, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you threw your head back, letting out a soundless moan. Your entire body shook, your cunt clenching around Kylo’s fingers, keeping him trapped inside of you. You slumped forward, collapsing against Kylo’s body as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. He littered your neck and face with kisses, kissing every inch he could get his lips on. 

He slid his fingers from you gently before taking each on in his mouth, sucking your juices from his fingers. He groaned at the taste of you, his eyelids fluttering shut. “Delicious,” he smirked. You smiled dopily, still dazed from your powerful orgasm. Kylo leaned in for a kiss, the taste of you still on his tongue. The kiss was slow and sensual, leaving you even more breathless than you already were. 

You felt Kylo run his hands over your thighs and to your garter belt. He reached an arm down, fumbling to find the knife he had dropped. Once he retrieved it, he sliced through your garter belt, letting it fall either side of you. You kicked off your heels as he pulled down your stockings, leaving you completely bare on top of him. 

You were quickly suspended in the air, thrown over Kylo’s shoulder. You shrieked before laughing, your hands grappling at the back of his white shirt. A firm hand collided with the cheek of your arse, causing a stinging sensation, as well as pleasure, ripping through your body.

Kylo’s hands roamed all over your body as he carried you to his bedroom. The same bedroom he used to fuck you in. The same bedroom he now shares with Rey. You didn’t have time to think about that now, not when he dropped you on to the bed and quickly covered your entire body with his, pinning you to the mattress. 

You moaned into his mouth, tongues darting out to taste one another. “You’re wearing far too many clothes, Ren,” you taunted as you began running your hands over his shirt, pulling the white buttons through the holes, bearing his skin to you. While you worked his shirt off, his hands worked his trousers, shoes and socks, quickly trying to rid himself of everything he still had on.

He was so worked up, worked up from your teasing, worked up from you riding his fingers in the living room. He had to bury himself inside of you, had to claim you as his own. 

Kylo’s clothes were thrown haphazardly around the room, both of you far too impatient to place them neatly. He stroked himself several times above you before gripping his cock at the base. He drew your legs around his hips and thrust into you with one quick movement, causing lewd moans to fill the room.

You wrapped your arms around his back, feeling the muscles move with every hard thrust he gave you, the sound of his hips slamming into you thighs was like music to your ears. Kylo’s left hand gripped your hip, pinning you into the mattress as he fucked you relentlessly. The other slid up to your neck, grasping at it. 

You moaned as he squeezed ever so slightly. Your hands roamed his body, wanting to feel every movement as he completely wrecked you. Kylo leant forward, brushing his lips across your neck in open mouth kisses before stopping at your ear. “Say you’re my girl,” Kylo grunted into your ear, his teeth nipping at the lobe. You moaned, your mind numb from the pleasure of Kylo’s cock repeatedly thrusting into you, his hard and fast pace never wavering. The hand at your throat tightened its grip on you, “say it,” he hissed.

“I’m your girl, I’ll always be your girl, no-one else’s…fuck please Kylo, pleasepleaseplease!” you babbled, tears of pleasure rolling down your cheeks. Your manicured nails scraped down his back, causing him to hiss in pleasure at the sensation.

“That’s fucking right, no-one else can fuck you like I can. Not even that fucking fiancé of yours.” He bit down on your shoulder, his crooked teeth leaving equally crooked marks on your skin. You moaned at the pain, revelling in the pleasure it gave you. In an instant, you felt his thumb on your clit, rubbing you just how you liked. “Cum for me, darling. Cum on my cock, scream out my name. Let everyone know who fucks you this good.”

You could tell he was getting close, his thrusting growing sloppy. His thumb on your clit rubbed faster, and his cock repeatedly hit that sweet spot inside you, tipping you over the edge.

“KYLO!” You screamed as you clenched around his cock. Waves of pleasure came over you, you felt like you had blacked out for a second. You gripped at his strong and muscled shoulders, clinging onto him for dear life as he continued to fuck you, rubbing your clit through your orgasm.

“Fuck, shit, fuckfuckfuck…FUCK!” Kylo roared as his own orgasm took over him, spilling everything he had inside of you. You could feel his cum painting your walls. His grip on your throat loosened as he came down from his high and he ran his hands all over your body. Your sides, legs, arse, anything and everything that he could reach. He pressed his forehead to your and closed his eyes, basking in the post-orgasmic bliss you found yourselves in.

He went to pull out of you, but you wrapped your legs tighter around his waist, not wanting him to move from you just yet. “Don’t…” you whispered hoarsely. He mumbled something incoherent, but stayed still, wrapping the arm that wasn’t supporting his weight around your body, lifting your back slightly off the bed to be pressed fully into him.

He peppered kisses along your neck and shoulder, kissing all the marks he had left on you. “I meant it, y’know,” he whispered into your sternum, still peppering kisses to your skin.

“What?”

“You’re my girl, you’ll always be my girl.” He finally looked up at you, those big, brown eyes gazing into yours. They looked glassy with the unshed tears that had begun to form. “You’ve always been my girl, I was just too much of an asshole to never notice it, not until you went away.” He bowed his head and pressed a soft and longing kiss to your lips.

“I know,” you whispered back, your hands moving to cup his cheeks. “I know,” you reiterated, letting him know that it was okay. You rubbed your nose against his softly. “I love you,” you whispered as you craned your neck slightly to kiss him.

He moaned softly as your lips pressed together, molding perfectly to one another. “I love you too.”

Finally, you dropped your legs, allowing Kylo to remove his softened cock from inside you. He rolled onto his back beside you, pulling you straight into his chest. You stayed next to him for a minute before you decided it was best to go to the bathroom. “I’ll be right back,” you promised as you hopped out of bed and to the ensuite. 

By the time you came back, Kylo was looking at his phone, brow furrowed slightly. You curled up beside him, draping your arm over his waist. “What’s that look for?”

“Rey, she’s staying at Rose’s tonight. Too much to drink apparently and she doesn’t want to walk over,” Kylo explained as he placed his phone on the bedside table. “Which means,” Kylo began, a smirk forming on his face as he rolled you over, pressing your back into the mattress. He dipped his head to your neck, kissing up the length of it because hovering his lips just above your ear. “I can keep fucking you until the sun comes up.” 

You matched his smirk as your legs came up to wrap back around his waist. “Well, what are you waiting for?”


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry it’s taken so long for this to be posted! Work took more out of me than I anticipated it to, so my head just wasn’t in the right headspace to sit down and write. Hopefully you guys enjoy this! 
> 
> I have been active on my Tumblr, and even have some one shots that I haven't posted here yet, so feel free to check those out and come say hi!
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: Okay so this is starting to get dark guys! Domestic abuse, slapping, choking, violence against Reader from a third party, blood, threats of rape against Reader, nonchalant reaction to domestic abuse, swearing.

**Chapter Seven**

Two weeks had passed since that night at Kylo’s, since he officially confessed to you that his wedding with Rey was, for now, going ahead. The official announcement had been made at a meeting a week ago, everyone now knowing of Kylo and Rey’s impending nuptials. What they didn’t know was Kylo’s incessant planning to avoid it.

You walked back into your apartment you shared with Oliver. You still hadn’t moved back to the apartment that was below Kylo’s, the apartment you had before you left for England. You had thought about it, but decided that since your affair had been getting more and more intense, it was probably for the best to stay where you were.

It was evening by the time you arrived back, just gone 6:30. You’d been with Kylo again, not fucking but planning. Planning, step-by-step, your takedown of Jabba. Gwen, Hux, Poe and Finn were also there, being the best shots in the gang. 

You gently closed the door, letting the latch _click_ into place. You hung up your coat, heels clicking along the hardwood floor as you walked through your home. 

Oliver was sitting in the living room, arms spread out on the back of the sofa, a tumbler of whiskey in his hand and a lit cigarette in the other. “What time do you call this?”

Your eyebrows shot into your hairline at his tone. “I beg your pardon?”

He threw his head over his shoulder, his eyes blown out in rage. “ _I said,_ ” he spat through gritted teeth. “ _What time do you call this?_ ” 

You’d never seen him look so angry before. You didn’t know he was even capable of this sort of anger. Your heart rate increased but you didn’t let it show on your face. “It’s six thirty in the evening, it’s hardly late,” you told him, standing perfectly still, not daring to move an inch closer to him.

Taking a long drag of his cigarette and blowing the smoke out into the living room, he continued, “I received a parcel today.” He completely bypassed what you had just said. He leaned forward and placed the whiskey tumbler on the hardwood coffee table, not using a coaster. He lifted a brown envelope up in his hand. “It was addressed to me personally, which I thought was nice. I don’t get many parcels in my line of work.”

He was calm, far too calm for the rage that was ignited behind his eyes. “Take a look.” He threw the envelope back down on the table, the sound of it slapping against the wood of the table making your eye twitch ever so slightly. “Go on.” 

You slowly walked over to the table, eyeing the envelope. You picked it up, and looked inside, quickly examining the contents. It looked to be photographs, A4 in size. You grabbed the photo at the top, pulling it out.

Your heartbeat increased rapidly as your eyes fell on the picture.

It was you and Kylo. Someone had spotted you in his apartment.

You quickly rummaged through the rest, at least thirty photos of you and Kylo, leaving nothing to the imagination. You couldn’t even lie and say it wasn’t you since there was a close up of you and Kylo.

Your mouth felt dry as you inspected each and every photograph. You had to tell Kylo, you had to let him know.

So many questions ran through your mind. Who had done this? How had they done this? Why had they done this? Had Rey received the same envelope? Was Kylo now on his way to be interrogated by Rey?

Before you could even open your mouth to speak, a hard, punishing slap landed across your face. The slap was so hard you could taste blood in your mouth. 

You barely had time to think before a hand wrapped tightly around your throat, your body being roughly shoved into the wall behind you. You couldn’t even yell out at the pain, your windpipe was completely restricted. You clawed at Oliver’s hand wrapped around your neck, trying to get him off of you but to no avail. 

You thrashed, kicked, punched and slapped, trying to get him off you. Your vision started to become blurry, the need for oxygen becoming stronger and stronger. Finally, finally, you managed to aim a kick just right, your knee colliding with his crotch, causing him to stumble back in agony. You kicked off your shoes, knowing they'd only slow you down as you tried to run.

You tried to make an escape, only for arms to wrap around your waist, tugging you back to the living room. You hollard out, screaming for someone to help you. You were manhandled around to face Oliver, another harsh slap landing to your face. The signet ring Oliver wore caught your lip, splitting it open. “Let go of me!” you hissed.

“No! You don’t get to sleep around! You’re my fiancée! I don’t care if you don’t love me, you don’t get to whore yourself out to the man who fucking left you! Where is he now huh? Not around to save you this fucking time!”

You fought for your life. You fought for what seemed like hours. That was until you felt a cold metal pressing into your neck, the sharp point digging into the hollow of your neck just enough to draw blood. You whimpered slightly. A sick smirk formed on Oliver’s face at the sound. “You’re not so terrifying now are you?”

“He’ll kill you for this,” you whispered. He may be able to get the upper hand on you, but Oliver would never, _never_ win against Kylo. “He’ll kill you just for slapping me. I can’t imagine what he’s going to do when he sees me like this.”

“He won’t see you, not again. I’ll make fucking sure of that. You’re gonna be a good little wife from now on, do as I say and leave that _bastard_ Ren for good.”

His eyes were rabid, completely deranged as he held your gaze. One arm securing you to his chest, the other still holding the knife to your throat. Your eyes stung with tears, not at the thought of marrying Oliver, not even at the thought of dying at Oliver’s hand, but at the thought of never seeing Kylo again. A year had seemed like an eternity, but what would eternity really feel like?

“You’ve made me a laughing stock,” Oliver hissed, spit flying from his mouth and landing on your face as he spoke. “What kind of man can’t even keep his fucking future wife under control? Should have fucked you more often, even if you didn’t want it. Keep you satisfied, keep you from running back to _him!_ ”

“Please…” you begged, tears freely rolling down your face. “Just let me go.”

“Why? So you can run back to your boyfriend? So he can come back here and put a bullet through my skull? No fucking chance.”

“Please!” you screamed. 

Another slap. You quickly realised he used the hand that had been wrapped around your body, keeping your still. You quickly headbutted him, causing him to stagger and fall back against the coffee table.

You ran.

“FUCK!” Oliver screamed. 

You scanned the hallway quickly, for something to defend yourself with. Your eyes landed on the heavy crystal ashtray you’d inherited from your grandmother. You’d never been so thankful for it. You grabbed it, hiding it behind you as Oliver entered the foyer. “Get the _fuck_ back here!”

“Leave me alone! Let me go and I’ll make sure Kylo won’t come after you.”

Oliver surged forward, knocking you both to the ground, the knife slicing through the top of your arm, causing you to holler out in pain. “GET OFF ME!” You screamed over and over again, running your voice raw. You lifted the ashtray high with the arm that hadn’t been sliced, you left arm and brought it down on the side of his head, hitting Oliver just right to knock him out. 

You hit him several times more, just enough to keep him down but not to kill him. You’d leave that to Kylo.

Scrambling off the floor, you ran as fast as you could out of your apartment, blood trailing behind you as you did.

Your heart was pounding in your chest as you pressed the lift button frantically, hoping you could make it downstairs before Oliver gained consciousness. Thankfully, all your prayers were answered. You ran inside, pushing the ‘close doors’ buttons before grabbing your now cracked phone. There was only one person you could call.

Pressing Kylo’s name, you held the phone to your ear, the phone ringing once before he answered. Before he could even say your name you cried down the phone, “help me!” Your whole body shook with tears and fear as you tried to keep the phone against your ear.

“What happened?! Where are you?!” He sounded frantic, the sound of items crashing onto the floor and heavy footsteps could be heard in the background. He was coming for you.

“O-Oliver…he f-found o-out…hit me…” you tried to say through sobs.

“I’m coming to get you darling; can you stay in the lobby for me?” His voice was calm, but his breathing was heavy, it was something you knew happened when he was truly angry, when he was really out for blood. You mumbled an answer that resembled a yes to him. “Good, I won’t be long, darling. Just stay there.”

At the same time, the lift doors opened for you, revealing the large reception to your apartment building. You ran over to the desk, muttering another ‘help me’ to them. They practically jumped into action, bringing you behind the desk, telling you to stay down.

You guessed this was a perk to your family's connections, everyone seemed to be in their pocket and ready to help you at the drop of a hat. A muffled noise came from your phone. You realised you hadn’t disconnected the call, and Kylo was frantically calling your name. “I’m here, I’m sorry, I’m really sorry,” you sobbed again, a bloodied hand coming over your mouth to try and limit the sound of your tears. You didn’t know whether the blood was your own or Oliver’s. Maybe it was a mixture of the two.

You heard a sigh of relief at the other end of the phone. “Don’t be sorry darling, you’re okay yeah? You safe? Tell me you're safe,” his voice sounded like he was far away. You realised he must be driving and had put you on speaker while he drove to get you.

“Yes, I’m hiding behind reception, they’re looking after me. Please hurry, I don’t know when he’s going to wake up. Please, Kylo…” you continued to babble to him, uttering ‘pleases’ and ‘hurries’ as he reassured you he was close.

It felt like an eternity before the receptionist got you attention, ushering you up gently and into the broad arms of someone. You didn’t have to look up to realise it was Kylo, his broad frame engulfing your entire body. You sobbed into his chest as he smoothed his right hand up and down your back. “C’mon, darling. I need to get you out of here, I need to make sure you’re safe,” he whispered into the top of your head. 

He ushered you out of the hotel and straight into his car which had been left outside. Kylo carefully placed you in the passenger's seat, buckling you in so you were safe before quickly making his way to the driver’s side. You saw the blood drying on his black shirt. 

Kylo turned to face you, his large hands cupping your face, his forehead pressing gently to yours. “You’re safe with me,” he whispered softly, pressing a soft, chaste kiss to your split lip. 

You believed him. As long as Kylo was around, you were safe. 

Then it hit you.

The searing pain of your right arm, a clean cut from the tip of your shoulder to just above your elbow. You winced and Kylo noticed. He hadn’t seen it, you didn’t know how. Maybe he was too busy looking at the marks that littered your face, the split lip that decorated you. 

Kylo’s jaw clenched, anger burning through his veins. Oliver was going to be a dead man anyway for hitting you, but the fact he had the audacity to wound you, to make you bleed, to scar you. That tipped him over the edge. 

You sensed him simmering with anger, ready to go and kill Oliver straight away, but you reached out to him, held him back and comforted him. 

_Stupid._ He thought. _She’s injured and bleeding, and she’s the one comforting me._

You gave him a soft smile, it hurt but you did it anyway. For him. “Stay with me. Please? Like I did for you all those years ago.” Your voice was soft, tender and sweet. When Rey gave him his scar, you’d been the same as Kylo was now, simmering with rage, a burning desire fueling you to go and hurt her. But he made you stay. 

Now the tables were turned.

“Let the Knights look over him, keep him in the apartment until we decide what we’re going to do.”

_We._ You were in this together, always would be. 

“They’re already on their way over, I text them not long after I got in the car to come and get you.” 

Your heart soared at his confession and you let your thumb brush over his cheekbone. 

Kylo let his shoulders slump, let himself relax somewhat. He bought your left hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to it. Your hand still wore the ring you’d been given. Kylo wrapped his fingers around it, gently tugging at the metal, letting it slide off your finger. “I think we can get rid of this now.”

You chuckled softly, nodding your head before Kylo threw the ring out of the window, not caring where it landed, or whether it hit anyone. 

You were free.

The ride to Kylo’s was quiet, Kylo driving like a madman to get you back to safety, back to his place where he could look after you, hold you close to him. 

“Someone knows Kylo...someone sent him pictures, a good thirty-odd picture of me and you two weeks ago. They could see directly into your living room,” you explained to him, running your bloodied hand through your hair.

“Are they still in the flat? The pictures?” 

“Yeah, somewhere in the living room I think. Unless Oliver wakes up and hides them.”

Kylo said nothing, just simply nodded his head in acknowledgment. You could tell his brain was running a hundred miles an hour, so you simply held his hand that wasn’t gripping the steering wheel in a crushing grip. You squeezed his hand, your silent reminder that you were okay, you felt safe, and you were there for him too. 

“There’s a spare shirt in the glove box, use that to apply pressure to your arm.”

——-

You finally arrived at his flat, the white shirt of Kylo’s soiled in your blood. You were in a black tank top of Kylo’s and black shorts of his, your dress having been soiled in yours and Oliver’s blood. You sat on his bed, the same bed he’d sat on when his face was freshly cut.

This time, it was Kylo stitching up your arm with medical precision. “You’re much calmer than I was,” you joked, trying to ease the tension in the room. 

“This shouldn’t have happened,” was all he grumbled. 

“Kylo, look at me.” 

He kept his eyes trained on your arm, ignoring your request. You took his chin in your hand, forcing him to look at you. “It happened, but we’ll fix it. We always do.”

After a moment of silence, Kylo signed heavily. He finished off stitching your arm and covered it, clearing away the medical supplies before kneeling in front of you once more. “I was terrified,” he began, taking hold of both of your hands in his. “When I heard you crying, I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my entire life.” 

He rested his head in your lap, cheek pressing into your thigh. “I want you to move back into your apartment, so you can be near me. Fuck Rey, fuck what anyone says, I _need_ you to be near me. _Please darling...please…_ ” he begged you, eyes shining with unshed tears for you. 

You ran your hands through his hair, brushing the strands of hair that had fallen across his face out of the way. 

Moving into your old flat, the flat that was currently sitting empty right below you, came with so many memories, so many complications. But now, your engagement was over, even if Oliver didn’t know that. The only thing that stood between you and Kylo was Rey.

You also couldn’t stand to ever be back in the flat you had shared with Oliver, not after tonight.

You carded your hands through Kylo’s hair, moving the fallen strands away from his face. You bent your body down to meet him, pressing your lips to his in a firm kiss. “Okay, I’ll do it,” you whispered against his lips.

Kylo surged forward, pressing his lips to yours in a needy kiss. His hands found purchase on your waist, his fingers flexing and digging into the skin. You moaned into his mouth, your tongue dragging along his lower lip, begging for entry which he readily gave you. 

Your kiss turned hungry, your mouths beginning to devour one another. You’d been in this situation before, when Kylo had been injured. Back then, you’d been so scared to lose him, and Kylo had never been so close to dying. Both of you realised that you needed one another, but just couldn’t find the words to verbalise it. 

This was how you told each other you needed one another. This was your confession of love. 

Kylo rose from the floor slowly, using his strength to push you gently back up the bed, his strong, hard body crowding you. His hands moved to cradle your face, his knees pressing into the mattress either side of your hips. You both wanted this, you both needed this. 

“No one will ever hurt you again,” Kylo whispered against your lips. “I’ll make him pay for hurting you.” 

You ran your hands up and down his shirt clad back, soothing him, comforting him. “We’ll make him pay together, I want my own revenge on him.” 

A dark smirk played on Kylo’s lips. He loved seeing you in action, loved watching you torment someone, loved watching the control you had over someone’s life. “Whatever my girl wants, she gets.” 

You giggled softly as you looked up at Kylo through your lashes. 

Just as you were about to lean in to kiss him once more, the front door to the penthouse apartment slammed shut. You both froze for a second, heads snapping to the place where the sound had come from. “Shit! Rey’s home,” Kylo finally seethed, quickly removing his body from yours. 

“Where the hell has she been?” 

“God knows, I don’t really care at this point.”

The sound of keys dropping in a dish and the echoing of heels on hardwood floor rang in your ears as Rey walked closer and closer to the master bedroom. You remained on the bed, sitting at the foot of it. Kylo stood beside you, hovering over you like a guardian angel. 

Rey inched closer and closer to the bedroom door, finally coming within centimetres of it. She forcefully pushed the bedroom door, letting it swing back so hard it hit the wall behind it.

“If you could not destroy my apartment Rey,” Kylo spat, his jaw locking in anger. You wanted to reach out to him, reach out and touch him, wanting to sooth him. But you didn’t. You kept your hands in your lap, preventing them from reaching towards Kylo. 

Rey scoffed as she looked at Kylo, her eyes darting to you. She looked over your injuries, the bruised cheek, the split lip, the arm that was wrapped in bandages. She took in your attire as well, you sat on Kylo’s bed, wearing his clothing. “What’s _she_ doing here?”

You could feel Kylo simmering with rage at her words, you could practically feel his anger rolling off of him in waves. 

Your own gaze hardened as you looked at her, staring her down from your position on the bed. “Preparing for the New York City Ballet, what does it look like I’m doing here?” you snapped at Rey, moving yourself to stand up. Your body ached as you did, and you winced when you applied too much pressure to your injured arm as you tried to stand. 

You noticed Kylo’s fingers twitching, aching to come to your aid, wanting to hold you and help you. He didn’t want you to be in any more pain than you already were. But he couldn’t. Not while Rey was standing a few feet from you both. “Oliver lost it, slapped me around, choked me, sliced up my arm. I managed to hit him with a crystal ashtray and get away.”

Rey said nothing for a moment. She just took in your attire, your puffy eyes from crying earlier and your dull looking skin, caused by the loss of blood. Then she smirked. “Hmm. It’s about time someone took you down a peg or two.”

The air in the room changed dramatically. Rey still wore an unkind smirk on her face, she was practically giddy with excitement about your ordeal. You had been beaten, hurt, slapped, choked, cut and all she could do was laugh at you. You never thought this is how she would turn out, after years of friendship between the two of you, this was all that remained. For all the shit you had seen, this had to be the worst. 

Kylo was glowering beside you, his anger at an all time high as he glared at Rey. “Get the fuck out,” Kylo spat at her. Your head snapped towards him, practically giving yourself whiplash. 

Rey’s face dropped, her eyes shining with tears as Kylo began throwing her clothes into bags. You thought he was only throwing enough clothes for a couple of days, just a few days for you both to plan your revenge without Rey leering over you both. But when Kylo continued, throwing all of her clothes, shoes, underwear and makeup into bags, you realised he meant this to be permanent. “Wait! No! I’m sorry!” she cried, running towards him, begging him to stop packing up her things. 

He just continued, moving effortlessly around her while she continued to follow him like a lost puppy, pleading and begging with him to let her stay. “If that’s what you think about someone being _beaten_ to an inch of their _fucking life_ then I don’t want to be around you!” Kylo hissed, throwing the packed bags down at her feet.

All you could do was stand and watch. Watch as Kylo kicked his fiancée out of their home, watch as Kylo actively chose you over her. 

“You can’t do this to me! We have a _fucking arrangement!_ You can’t choose her over me! I’m your _fucking fiancée!_ ”

Kylo grabbed the top of her arm, not tightly, but just enough to carry her outside of the flat. He spotted her house keys in the dish in the foyer, quickly grabbing them so she couldn’t get back into the apartment. You followed behind, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the scene unfolding in front of you. He threw Rey out of the apartment, bags following behind her. “Not anymore,” he hissed, slamming the door on her. 

He rested his hand flat against the closed door, panting heavily. You could see the rippling of his back muscles through the thin black shirt he still wore. 

He finally managed to compose himself, swiftly locking the door. He turned to face you, eyes still holding anger in them, but not for you.

“Kylo…” you whispered softly as you closed the gap between the two of you. You reached up, cupping his face in your hands. “What have you done?”

“I made a decision.”


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She’s back with an update! I’m so sorry it took so long! Between writing prompts on Tumblrand work I just hadn’t found the time to update this fic, which is a shame because I love it so much! 
> 
> I can’t promise a speedy update for Chapter Nine, but I want you all to know that I haven’t just abandoned this fic!
> 
> I also want to thank you all for over 100 kudos! That's so amazing! Thank you so much!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy!

**Chapter Eight**

Neither you or Kylo spoke for ages after he kicked Rey out of the apartment. You both simply returned to bed, sitting beside one another, both of you pretending you were watching whatever show was playing on the TV. 

Your mind was still running 100mph. What just happened would surely come back to bite both of you in the arse. Someone already had it out for the two of you, what with the pictures having been sent to Oliver, but now added to that was Rey. And she was going to be on the warpath.

Kylo could sense your unease, the way you nibbled at the skin around your fingertips, something you did when you were anxious. He reached a hand across the bed to yours, pulling your fingers away from your mouth. He pressed soft kisses to the bitten ones and continued holding your hand in his. 

He whispered your name, forcing you to look at him. He wore a soft smile on his face, a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I know what I’ve done,” he whispered, shuffling closer so that his body was pressed against yours. “I know what I’ve done, and I know there will be consequences. You know I’ll fight tooth and nail to keep you safe.”

You believed him, you really did. But you were still worried, still scared about what Rey could do. You turned your body to face him, resting on your left arm. Your faces were centimetres from each other, noses almost touching. “I’ll stay by your side, no matter what,” you confessed. “But let’s face one problem at a time, we still have Oliver to sort out.” 

Kylo’s jaw clenched at his name. Kylo had never liked the man you were engaged to, mainly because he would be the one to take you away from him. Now, Kylo hated him. Hated him with every fibre of his body. He wanted to torture him, make him suffer. Kylo wanted to parade you in front of Oliver, show him who you really belonged to. He’d kiss you in front of him, touch you in front of him, make Oliver see that you never belonged to him. Make him see that you only belonged to Kylo. Kylo wanted the last words Oliver would ever hear would be you confessing to Kylo that you loved him. He wanted the last sight Oliver ever saw would be you coming completely undone by Kylo, screaming his name in pleasure.

That’s what he wanted.

Your hand quickly came up to stroke Kylo’s face, trying to sooth him. “Hey, look at me, just me,” you said quickly as an attempt to bring Kylo back to you. “Together okay? We do this together.”

You pressed your lips to his forehead, his nose, his cheeks, his jaw and his lips. You knew your kisses soothed him, kept him at bay. You felt his shoulders relax slightly, but not as much as you would want. Still, something was better than nothing. 

You felt Kylo wrap his arms around your body, tugging you closer to him while still being careful of your arm. He looked over your face, the injuries you had sustained. There was a dark handprint mark round your throat now. “Will you let me torture him?” Kylo asked you, tracing the bruise with his fingertips. “Will you let me make him suffer?”

“Of course, darling,” you whispered. “As long as you let me partake,” you smirked.

“I would never deny you anything. You should know that by now, I’ll give you everything you’ve ever wanted.” He was so sincere, so forceful in the way he spoke sometimes. It only ever reminded you just how powerful he was, and how powerful his love for you was. “If anyone ever hurts you again, just know they’ll receive the same treatment every time. I won't hesitate to kill anyone who ever _looks_ at you the wrong way.”

You couldn’t help but smile at his words. “You spoil me far too much.”

“You know it’s true.”

Your hand trailed over his chest, coming to rest on his pec to feel the beating of his heart below. “I do. And I want you to know I’d do the same for you. I should have killed Rey when I had the chance all those years ago. It’s one of my biggest regrets,” you whispered, pressing another sweet kiss to Kylo’s lips. You lingered for a while longer, needing to feel the soft plushness against your lips for a moment longer.

Kylo hugged you closer, bringing your head to his chest. “Sleep now, darling. God knows you need it.” 

You closed your eyes, listening to the steady sound of his heartbeat below your ear. His hand smoothed up and down your back, coaxing you into a deep sleep. 

\-----

By the time you woke up, you were alone in bed. The sheets were only slightly cold, so Kylo couldn't have been up for too long. You pushed yourself up, hissing in agony when you remembered the injury to your arm. You tried to call out to Kylo, but your throat seized, only managing to rasp out a hoarse, “Kylo?” 

Clearly the effects of being strangled and yelling had finally caught up with you. 

You slump against the headboard in frustration, your body seizing with anger. You felt so helpless. You couldn’t even push yourself off the bed without wincing. You couldn’t even talk without sounding like you smoked 60 a day. You gnawed at your bottom lip in frustration, the anger easily rolling off you in waves.

The creaking of the door made you snap out of your self-pitying for a moment. Your eyes landed on Kylo, just in his black boxers, carrying a trayful of food and beverages. “Morning, princess.” He smiled at you, walking over to you and placing the tray beside you. He pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead. “I got you some chamomile tea, put a bit of honey in it to help your throat,” he told you, placing the teacup delicately on the bedside table next to you. “How do you feel?”

“Terrible,” you rasped. Kylo winced at the sound of your voice. It pained him to see you hurt, pained him to know what you had gone through and that he wasn’t there to stop it. “But I’m feeling better with you here,” you quickly added, seeing the spiral he was going down.

Kylo perked up slightly at that, giving you a soft and small smile, followed by a quick peck on the lips. “Drink up, it’ll make you feel better,” he ordered gently, taking a swig of his own black coffee. “Now you’re not going to like this, but it’s probably best if you don’t try and talk for a little while-”

You made a noise of protest, cutting Kylo off before he could finish. But he gave you a stern look, prompting you to shut your mouth. “Rest your voice, I want to hear those pretty little noises you make for me when I fuck you again.”

You smirked at him, trailing a finger up his exposed thigh, stopping just at the bottom of his boxers. “Just for you.”

\-----

The tea certainly helped. That and the fact Kylo would cover your mouth with his hand every time you went to talk, effectively stopping you. As annoying as it was to admit it, not talking and drinking your tea soothed your throat rather quickly. 

By mid afternoon, you were feeling slightly better, the pain in your throat not as prominent as it was before. You decided you were sick of being stuck in bed all day. You moved from your position on the large bed, needing to stretch your legs after being cooped up all day. The only time you’d left the bed was to shower, and that had been almost six hours ago.

You were still dressed in Kylo’s shorts and shirt from last night, the only clothes you had available to you, besides your blood soaked dress and heels. You wandered through Kylo’s large penthouse apartment, wandering towards the living room where you could hear his voice. 

He was talking on the phone, you knew that much. His voice was clipped, his tone agitated as a free hand ran over his face. You could see him from your position in the living room doorway, his arms resting on his knees with his head hung. Your heart broke for him, seeing him so broken. The floorboards creaked softly under your feet as you moved forward, causing Kylo’s head to snap up to you. You smiled softly at him, walking forwards until you were directly in front of him. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure Vic. We’ll figure something out, it won’t be much longer. Just keep him out yeah?” Kylo ended the call, sighing heavily and leaning back in the grandfather chair. He patted his lap gently, indicating for you to sit down. You readily obliged. 

You sat sideways, wrapping your arms around Kylo’s neck and held him close. He buried his face in your neck, pressing soft kisses to your skin. “I’m guessing the Knights are still looking after Oliver?” you asked Kylo softly as you ran your fingers through his hair. 

Kylo simply hummed in response, letting his eyes flutter shut at the feeling of your hands in his hair. “They have him tied to a chair, he’s been gagged and blindfolded since we left,” Kylo explained to you as his hand trailed lazily up and down your arm.

“Good,” you hummed softly. “I hope the boys haven’t hurt him too much, I want him as alert as possible when we pay him a visit.”

“Don’t worry, I’ve made sure the Knights haven’t hurt him too much,” Kylo smirked.

\-----

It was late in the evening when you and Kylo finally paid a visit to your apartment. You’d spent all day planning on what you were going to do, on what Kylo was going to do when he came face to face with your ex-fiancé. 

You didn’t want to admit it, but you were slightly scared. Your body still shook at the thought of seeing the man who so easily wrapped his hand around your neck, trying to force the life out of you. The man who carved your arm, now giving you a scar you would forever wear. 

You paused outside your apartment building and gazed up at the high rise block. You could see the windows to your top floor apartment, the inside completely black, no light shining through it at all. You let out a shuddering breath.

Kylo’s warm hand pressed into the small of your back, his thumb rubbing over the fabric of your dress. “You’re okay, I’m here. If you don’t want to come in, I won’t force you,” he whispered softly into your ear. 

The warmth of his breath tickled your skin, sending goosebumps all over your body. You turned to face him and smile softly. “I’m okay, I just need a little bit longer. I’m sorry, I thought I would be okay bu-”

Kylo softly shushed you, stopping you from rambling. “There’s no need to apologise to me, darling. I’ll keep him alive long enough for you okay?” he smirked, which caused you to chuckle slightly. He pressed a sweet and soft kiss to your lips before moving his body away, leaving you slightly cold. “Message me when you’re on your way.”

With a final kiss, Kylo entered your building.

\-----

Kylo was unnervingly calm as he opened the door to your apartment. The hallway light shone dimly, just bright enough to light his way from the door to the living room where he knew Oliver was being kept. He could see the blood on the floor where Oliver had sliced your arm and where you in turn had hit him over the head. He hummed at the sight, angry and proud at the same time. 

He was almost immediately greeted by Vicrul, who was stood waiting for his boss to turn up. “Sir,” Vicrul said with a nod of his head. Kylo nodded back. Kylo could see Vicrul looking around for you, confused as to where you were.

“She’s downstairs, taking a breather. Keep the door unlocked for her, she’ll be up soon,” Kylo briefly explained. He shrugged off his suit jacket, placing it on the coat rack near the door. He began rolling up the sleeves of his black shirt, letting the cuffs sit just below his elbows. “Is he awake?” Kylo asked as both he and Vicrul made their way to the living room, which was being guarded by Kuruk and Cardo. Both men nodded their respect to Kylo, and he did the same.

“He’s awake, still blindfolded and tied to the chair. He stopped yelling about two hours ago. We had to waterboard him to shut him up.”

Kylo smirked softly, knowing Oliver has already been slightly tortured. If only he knew what was to come…

“Good,” Kylo nodded. “Kuruk, Cardo I hope you don’t mind keeping watch, just for when the lady of the house arrives.”

“No problem sir,” Kuruk spoke up.

“We were the ones who did the waterboarding,” Cardo finished.

Kylo smirked proudly. “Good men.”

Kylo effortlessly pushed open the living room door, and flicked on the lightswitch, illuminating the dark living room.

His eyes immediately fell to the man strapped to the chair in the middle of the living room. Your apartment had been rearranged so no furniture would be ruined, and plastic tarpaulin had been laid out around Oliver to protect your hardwood floors. The other Knights were sat around, just watching TV and checking on Oliver, as if nothing was wrong. 

The Knights stood to attention as Kylo entered the room. “I see you’ve kept our guest nice and secure,” Kylo smirked. He couldn’t help but chuckle as Oliver scrambled around on the chair at his voice, clearly knowing he was going to be suffering a fate worse than death. 

His muffled cries were like music to Kylo’s ears. He grabbed one of your spare dining chairs that were nearby, pulling up the seat so he was situated directly in front of Oliver. Kylo nodded to Ushar, the one who was currently watching Oliver, signalling for him to remove the blindfold.

Ushar did as he was told, slowly removing the blindfold. Kylo leant back in the seat with his arms crossed over his chest. He watched Oliver blink several times, his eyes adjusting to the bright light of your living room. 

When Oliver’s eyes landed on Kylo, he snapped. Oliver lunged his body forward, trying to get to Kylo. But Kylo didn’t flinch, didn’t even move a centimetre as Oliver’s actions. He just continued to smirk.

For Oliver, Kylo was the Devil. He had stolen you from him, you were supposed to be his forever, that was why you were engaged to him. Oliver had been so angry when he saw those photos, so angry that you had chosen Kylo over him. 

To Oliver, that was unforgivable. 

“Oh Oliver,” Kylo sighed and tutted, shaking his head as he spoke to him. “You’ve really fucked up.”

Oliver finally stopped struggling. Instead he raised his eyebrows at Kylo in confusion. 

“You see,” Kylo continued, “I don’t like guys who hit their partners, guys who think hitting a woman makes them a big man. Personally, I think they’re _scum,_ ” Kylo spat as his eyes hardened at Oliver. “What makes you think you get to lay your hands on my girl?”

Oliver let out a muffled response, but the gag was stopping him. With another gesture of the hand, Ushar undid the gag, finally letting Oliver speak. “She’s my fucking fiancée, she’s going to be married to _me_ , not you.”

Kylo chuckled yet again as his face curled into yet another smirk. “We’ll see,” he told Oliver.

“I’ll kill you before you take her away from me!”

“And how do you plan on doing that while you’re tied to a chair?” Kylo sassed, a smug smile quickly replacing the smirk he previously wore. “Here’s what’s going to happen Oliver; I’m going to ask you a question, and if you don’t answer honestly, I’m going to hurt you, very slowly. Hurt you like you hurt her. I’m going to drag it out, make you feel every bit of it. I’ll make it hurt so much that you’ll be begging for death.”

Oliver shook like a leaf, his whole body readily terrified of the intimidating man sat opposite him. “You don’t scare me,” Oliver shakily replied, his voice easily betraying his words.

“I should.”

Kylo pulled his favourite switchblade from his trouser pocket, the one he had used to slice your lingerie to pieces only a few weeks ago. Kylo smiled at the memory. “Who sent you those photos, Oliver?” he asked calmly as he twirled the blade between his fingers. 

Kylo saw Oliver gulp, swallowing heavily at the question. “I don’t know,” he said.

Kylo sighed heavily. “What did I tell you?”

Without warning, Kylo took the blade and pressed it to the skin of Oliver’s left arm and slowly dragged it down, deep enough to make him bleed and hurt. Oliver cried out at the searing pain, tears easily streaming down his face at the agony he’s being put through.

Kylo stopped at his elbow, and drew the knife away from his skin. “Who sent you those photos, Oliver?” Kylo repeated.

“I don’t know.”

Another heavy sigh left Kylo’s lips before he dragged the bloodied knife down the centre of his lip, cutting his lip. 

“I’m normally not a patient man, Oliver,” Kylo explained. “But for you, I think I’ll make the exception. I wanna see how much I can hurt you before you break.”

Kylo’s hand quickly wrapped around Oliver’s neck, crushing his windpipe easily in his large hand. “For the third time; who sent you those photos, Oliver?” Kylo hissed through his teeth.

Oliver’s face began to turn red, the air from his body slowly leaving. Kylo pressed on his neck hard, unboundedly leaving a bruise. Just as Oliver was on the verge of passing out, Kylo let go.

Oliver coughed and spluttered, gasping repeatedly for air. “I...don’t...k-know…” 

“You do realise I don’t believe you right?” Kylo sighed. “You say they were sent in the post, but there was no address on the envelope, so how does that work? Someone handed them to you didn’t they, Oliver?” 

Oliver shook his head, his mouth seemingly no longer working. Kylo could see the terror in his eyes. “Again with the _LIES!_ ” Kylo roared as backhanded Oliver across his left cheek. “Who sent you those photos, Oliver?”

Just as Oliver was about to reply, the apartment door clicked open.

The sound of your heels clicking along the floor echoed throughout the apartment, edging closer and closer to where Kylo and Oliver were. Slowly, you pushed open the living room door, causing both Kylo and Oliver’s eyes to fall to you. Kylo smirked as he saw you, and Oliver smiled, acting like a small puppy when they see that their owner has come back home.

Oliver’s smile didn’t last for long as you quickly fell to Kylo’s side, his left arm sliding around your waist and holding your close. You pressed your body to his side, bringing your left hand to rest in the centre of his chest. “Hello, darling,” you whispered to Kylo before pressing a hot kiss to his lips, both of you moaning at the taste of one another.

Oliver’s eyes darkened and his hands clenched in fists behind his back. “Whore!” he yelled as he began to lunge towards the both of you, even though he was still tied up.

Kylo broke the kiss and landed another harsh backhanded slap across Oliver’s face, a slap so powerful it shook his head to the side. Kylo glowered down at the man.

“Leave us please, boys,” you call to the Knights that were still in the room. “We can handle it from here. We’ll call you when we’re done. But Vicrul, leave your gun behind, I left mine at Kylo’s and I think I’ll be needing one later.”

Vicrul nodded and left his gun on your sofa before turning and leaving. You turned your attention back to Oliver and Kylo as the Knights left the room, leaving the three of you alone. 

You took in the injuries that Oliver had already sustained; the bust lip, the handprint on the throat that was already starting to bruise, the slice of the arm. 

Kylo had inflicted the same injuries on Oliver as Oliver had inflicted onto you. Your heart swelled, the strange yet sweet and romantic gesture warming your heart. You smiled softly at Kylo’s work. “Nice work, handsome,” you admired out loud as you grabbed Oliver’s chin between your thumb and index finger. “But I think more damage could be done.” 

Oliver noticed the change in your eyes, the way they darkened with bloodlust and anger as you looked at him. He softly spoke your name, “baby. Please, you don’t want to do this!” he begged, tears welling in his eyes as he pleaded with you. 

A cruel smile found its way to your face. “Oh Oliver, I’ve never wanted anything more.” 

You felt Kylo behind you, his hands running over the curves of your hips as he practically pinned himself to your back. “Now, now, darling. What did I say about playing with your food?”

“Do it?” You asked sweetly as you turned your head to look at Kylo. He let out a chuckle before he pressed his lips to yours, his tongue easily sliding between your lips and into your mouth. 

You heard Oliver growl from his position once again. “Why are you doing this?! How can you love him over me?!” Tears freely fell from Oliver’s eyes, completely setting his cheeks. 

Kylo pulled his lips from yours, but continued to kiss your neck and shoulders as you spoke to Oliver. “Do you honestly think I ever loved you? Have you forgotten the only reason we ever got engaged was to spare my family embarrassment? How could I ever love a man as weak and spineless as you?” You had to fight back a moan as Kylo sucked at the place where your neck and shoulder met, a weak spot of yours. “Why would I love you, when I loved Kylo?” 

Kylo hummed against your neck and pulled away. “She’s mine, Oliver. Always has been, always will be.” He looked deeply in your eyes, his right hand coming up to cup your cheek. He gave you another searing kiss, pouring all of his emotion into it.

When you broke from the kiss, you smiled at Kylo and bit your bottom lip softly. “Am I allowed to have my fun now?” you asked, eyes shining brightly in anticipation. 

Kylo ran his hands up and down your side, smiling softly at you. “Do your worst, darling.” He turned and sat down on your sofa that was angled towards Oliver, and now you. His eyes were trained on you, on the way you moved and operated. To Kylo, you’d never looked more beautiful. 

You smiled and turned your attention back to Oliver, who was still struggling to free himself from his restraints. “I’ll give it to you, Oliver,” you began, stepping closer to him. “You really don’t give up do you?”

“Why are you doing this to me?” Oliver asked feebly, his energy fading by the second. “We could have been happy.”

“Is that why you beat me up, strangled me, sliced up my arm?”

“You whored yourself out to _him!_ What was I supposed to do?!”

You wrapped your hand around his throat, mimicking the mark that had been left by Kylo. You squeezed at his neck, his face turning red at the loss of oxygen. “Not try to kill me, that’s what.” You pushed his neck away, letting it fall back forcefully. “I told you Kylo wouldn’t be happy, told you what would happen. But you didn’t listen.”

“You know, darling,” you heard Kylo say from his position on the sofa. Your head whipped around to face him. “He’s been _very_ uncooperative with me today, I asked him a simple question and he kept lying to me,” Kylo said in a put on sad tone.

Your lips curled into a cruel smile. “What did you ask him?”

“I wanted to know who gave him the photos.”

You turned back to Oliver, watching his face turn white as a sheet when he saw your face. “He thinks I’m lying! I don’t know who sent them! You have to believe me!”

“It’s a shame I don’t.”

You lifted your left leg, bringing your heeled shoes to his crotch. You knew this form of torture normally had guys screaming the truth in minutes. You pressed the red sole of your shoe to his crotch, pressing down just enough to have him wincing. “Answer the question, Oliver.”

“I-I d-did!” he panted, trying to squirm away from your shoe, which only made you press harder. He cried out in agony and fresh tears streamed down his face.

“I think you can do harder than that, darling,” Kylo told you, smirking at the pain you were inflicting. 

You pressed even hard, completely crushing him between the chair and your shoe. “FUCK! REY! IT WAS REY!” He finally cried.

You froze on the spot and Kylo jumped from his seat. He was next to you in a flash, standing right beside you as you removed your shoe from Oliver. “The fuck did you just say?” Kylo seethed.

“Rey came to me! She knew you two were having an affair, she just had to catch you. She was over at Rose’s and saw you two through the window, so she took pictures. She gave them to me, and we made a pact to have you killed,” he said as he looked over at you. 

Your heart rate increased. Rey had wanted you dead. “She wanted you dead! Still does! If you’re dead, then Rey can have Kylo to herself. That’s _everything! I swear!_ ”

You could feel Kylo steaming with anger beside you. How dare someone ever think of harming you, let alone trying to kill you. Kylo instinctively reach for you, needing to feel your body close to his. He would deal with Rey later, but right now, he still wasn’t done with Oliver. “I heard you made a little threat to my girl,” Kylo snarled as he squeezed your waist, keeping you impossibly close to him. “You said you should have fucked her more, even when she didn’t want it…”

Oliver swallowed thickly. “I-I d-d-did-” 

“Save it!” Kylo snapped. He took a deep breath to calm himself down. “I will tell you Oliver,” he stated calmly as he moved your body in front of him, Kylo pressing his body to the back of yours. “It’s a _gorgeous_ sight to watch her cum” 

You felt his hands at the hem of your dress, slowly inching up the material. “Kylo…” you whispered in confusion. 

He turned his gaze to yours, his eyes soft. “Say the word and I’ll stop,” he whispered gently, his hands pausing. 

But you shook your head, you wanted him to claim you, especially now that neither of you were technically engaged. Kylo smirked and kissed you quickly.

“Have you ever had that pleasure, Oliver?” Kylo taunted. You could see out of the corner of your eye, Oliver’s face beginning to flush red with anger. He was so angry, angry at the audacity Kylo had to do this in front of him. “Have you ever made her cum? No, you’d have to get near her for that, but I don’t think you let him near you. Did you darling?” 

You shook your head as you leaned back into Kylo’s body, feeling the warmth of his body on your back and the warmth of his hands on your thighs. Kylo pulled the bottom of your dress up and over your body, leaving you clad in just your underwear and heels. “Hmmm, _perfect,_ ” Kylo whispered.

His eyes darted over to Oliver, who had his gaze focused on the two of you. Oliver found he couldn’t look away, even if he wanted to. At that, Kylo smirked. “You shouldn’t have threatened her like that,” Kylo warned him darkly. “You shouldn’t have hurt her, so now I hurt you.”

Oliver whimpered as he watched Kylo remove the remaining items of your clothes, his hands skimming over every inch of your body. Kylo made you turn, your back now to Oliver. He wished it was him, in all the time you’d been together, he had never touched you like Kylo was touching you. Never got to feel how your breasts felt in his hands, never got to feel how wet your pussy would get. Never got to know the taste of you. This was his ultimate punishment. This would be the last thing he knew before he died. His last thought would be the woman he thought loved him, was actually in love with someone else.

Kylo’s eyes roamed your naked body, feasting himself of the perfection that was in front of him. You in turn, could only look at Kylo. It didn’t matter that Oliver was there, in fact, you barely noticed him. All you could think about was Kylo. You felt Kylo’s fingers toy with your already wet cunt. He slid his fingers up and down your slit, barely catching your clit but making you moan softly nonetheless. 

Kylo smirked. “I’ve barely touched you and you’re soaked for me, my angel. Is this what I do to you?” You hummed in agreement, but that answer only landed you with a sharp slap on your arse. “Speak up, angel. We have a guest.”

“Yes!” You gasped out as Kylo circles your clit with the pad of his index finger. Your knees buckled slightly under the pressure. “Only you can make me feel like this, only you have ever made me feel like this.”

Kylo chuckled darkly as his eyes flicked to Oliver. “D’you hear that? _Only me,_ ” he all but growled. 

Kylo moved backwards, placing himself back on the sofa with you on his lap, facing Oliver. Kylo pressed kisses and sucked marks onto your neck, marking you completely as he. He nibbled at your lobe, tugging ever so slightly. “I want you to ride my cock for me, angel,” he whispered in your ear, just for you to hear. “I want you to bounce on my cock and make those pretty noises you know I love. Are you comfortable with that, angel?” 

Kylo buried his face into your neck, inhaling your scent. His hands wound around your body, splaying across your torso to hold you close. “Yes,” you gasped out, already grinding back against his hardening cock, which was still hidden beneath his nicely pressed trousers. 

“Good girl,” he whispered hotly in your ear. “Now, take my cock out angel.”

You briefly glanced up at Oliver, only to see him glowering at the both of you. The vein on his neck was bulging as he strained to get to you, ready to harm the both of you. You couldn’t hide your smile when you removed Kylo’s cock from the confines of his trousers and boxers, slowly stroking his achingly hard member.

Kylo groaned lowly and let his head fall back against the sofa at the feeling of your soft hand on his hard cock. “Be good, angel,” Kylo hummed as he ran his hands up and down your sides, before slowly guiding you down and onto his cock.

Both of you let out moans of pleasure, the feral noises Oliver was making fading easily into the background. Your head fell back against Kylo’s shoulder as you sank down on to him, fully taking him. “That’s it, angel. Fuck, you feel so tight! And so wet for me,” he whispered hotly into your ear. “Do you like your ex watching you? Do you like him knowing that you’re all mine? Because let me tell you, princess, it’s the best _fucking_ thing.” 

He thrust up sharply into you, taking your breath completely away. You moaned loudly as he thrust again, his balls slapping against you and sounding through the room. “RIde me, princess. Make yourself cum on my cock, and don’t hold back those pretty sounds.”

You steadied yourself against Kylo, using all the strength you had to start bouncing up and down on his cock, slowly finding the rhythm that worked for you. Your mouth spilled small whimpers, whines and moans as you rode him, getting the angle just right so you could hit your g-spot. 

“That’s it,” Kylo whispered, his eyes darting between where your bodies were connected and where Oliver sat. “You look so good, princess. Feel so good too. My perfect woman, so good for me. Let everyone know who you belong to, hmm? Say it, angel. Who do you belong to?”

You panted heavily. You could feel the hair sticking to the back of your neck, but you didn’t care. “You,” you replied breathlessly as your eyes fluttered shut. You could feel your orgasm rising in the pit of your stomach, growing and growing with each bounce on Kylo’s cock. “Hmmm _fuck!_ It’s you Kylo, it’s always been you. I belong to you,” you rambled, your words growing louder and louder, loud enough for Oliver to hear.

“I can feel you clenching around me, angel. You getting close? Want me to play with your clit? Make you cum so hard that all you can remember is me?”

“Fuck! Yes! _Hmmm please Kylo!_ Make me cum, I wanna cum!” 

He chuckled deeply in your ear but did as you asked. He circled your clit, rubbing you in time with your bounces. You bounced even harder, chasing your climax. Your tits bounced with every move of your body, creating such a gorgeous sight for Oliver. 

He was so confused. There you were, bouncing up and down, tits bouncing in time but you weren’t riding him. He didn’t get to feel how tight you were, or whisper filthy things in your ear. No. It was _Kylo._

“Fuck! Kylo! Shit, I’m gonna cum…” you whined. Your mouth hung open in pleasure as your hips began to stutter, losing the rhythm you created. But you were so close, _almost there…_

Your body froze then shuddered as you reached your peak and you cried out Kylo’s name in pleasure. Your nails dug into Kylo’s thighs, creasing the material of his trousers. You continued to whimper and moan softly as you came down from your high, your body still shaking with pleasure. 

You felt Kylo secure his arm around your waist, holding you still as he thrust up into you, chasing his own orgasm. “So good, angel! Fucking all for me! No-one is gonna fuck you but me,” he growled in your ear. “Grab the gun, angel. You know what to do,” he ordered, his hips never stopping. 

Thankfully your arms were long enough to reach the gun Vicrul had so kindly placed on the sofa earlier. You could feel Kylo’s free hand reaching behind himself, unboundedly pulling out his own gun. “I’m so fucking close, angel! _Just...hang...on…_ ” he panted before calling out your name, spilling himself completely inside of you. He kissed and bit and sucked at your flesh as he came down from his high, his softening cock still inside of you.

You turned to face him and pressed a wet kiss to his lips. “Now?” you whispered.

“Now.”

You both aimed your guns at Oliver, and shot. Two bullet holes entered directly into his skull, killing him instantly. 

Kylo fell back against the sofa, pulling you against him. He kissed the top of your head as he trailed his hands up and down your arms. “I told you angel,” he said softly, breaking the comfortable silence that fell over the both of you. “I’d make you mine.”


	9. Update

Well this is a long overdue update! 

I just wanted to quickly drop in and say that there will be an update! I promise. A lot has happened since I last updated, mainly I was working a lot of hours, and even during Tier 4 restrictions here in the UK, I was still working. But last Sunday I got the news that I was out of a job, the landlord we rent our unit from isn't renewing our lease, so from mid-January I won't have a job to go to anymore.

But it's not all doom and gloom! I'll be doing a Master's degree come September, so I'll have nine months to prepare for that and I'll hopefully be writing and updating more!

I'm hoping for the next chapter to be out around the end of January (I know it's a long time! I'm sorry!) but hopefully after that, things will be a bit more regular. I've also got a Clyde fic in the works too so keep an eye out for that!

Thank you for the support!


	10. Chapter Nine

**Chapter Nine**

The seconds, minutes, and hours pass, neither you or Kylo knowing what to say.

Oliver was dead. Kylo had ended his engagement to Rey. You were both just waiting for the fallout. You knew you’d both have to come clean to your parents. These engagements were crucial, especially Kylo’s. It wasn’t just an engagement for him; it was a test of loyalty.

You could barely remember the car journey back the other night, the night you both killed Oliver. You dressed and left the apartment, leaving the Knights to clean up after the two of you. You and Kylo both sat in silence on the way back, the ramifications of both your actions finally sinking in.

When you returned to Kylo’s, you collapsed on the bed at the sudden weight of everything falling on your shoulders. You sobbed into the pillow, not because of regret, but because of what was to come.

Kylo held you and soothed you, telling you how everything was going to be okay, how he would fix everything. Nothing could stand between the two of you now.

—–

Several days had passed and you felt better. Most of your wounds had healed, all except the one on your arm, but even that was healing nicely.

You and Kylo still hadn’t discussed the course of action you were going to take when it came to your parents. Neither of you could decide the best way to break it to them, the best way to tell them how you love one another.

“We can’t just throw it all in their faces, can’t just turn around and say ‘by the way folks, we’ve been shagging for a while now, decided to bump off our fiancé’s and be together instead, is that okay?’,” you tell Kylo, slowly getting more and more frustrated.

Kylo runs his hand through his hair, tugging slightly at the ends. “I know, I know. But the shorter we keep our story, the less damage it causes.”

“The shorter you keep the story, Kylo, the more questions they end up asking!”

You both sigh heavily, neither of you wanting this to descend into an argument. Kylo walks over to where you stand in the bedroom, wrapping his arms tightly around your middle. You try to keep up the front, try to keep your arms crossed over your chest, but you give in. You place your hands on his chest, gently fisting his crisp white shirt in your hands.

You sigh heavily and rest your forehead to his chest, deeply inhaling his comforting scent. His arms tighten around your body, bringing you closer. “I don’t think there’s going to be an easy way to tell them is there?” you ask. Your words are slightly muffled by the fact your head is buried in Kylo’s chest, but he still hears you loud and clear.

You feel his lips on the top of your head pressing a long and lingering kiss there. “No,” he sighs into the top of your head. He leans back slightly, causing you to look up at him. “But you’re worth it.”

You feel your face heat up at his words, and you can’t help the fall chuckle that falls from your lips. You shake your head softly, letting your hands slide upwards and over his shoulders, squeezing them affectionately.

You raise your eyes to gaze up into his, staring into his gorgeous honey orbs. “I think,” you begin to softly say, keeping your voice gentle and low, “I think it’ll be best to speak to them separately. I’ll speak to my parents, and you speak to yours. And we tell them the truth, all of it.”

Kylo continues to stare deep into your eyes as he sighs softly, rubbing his hands up and down your sides. “Okay.” Is all he says, but that’s enough for you.

You bring your left hand up to his face, allowing your thumb to trace the long healed scar that adorned his face. “Thank you,” you whisper.

Kylo turns his head in your hand to let his plush, soft lips kiss your palm. “I don’t regret what we did, what I did,” he breathes softly while he stares directly into your eyes, “I’d do it all over again.”

You release a shaky breath that you hadn’t realized you’d been holding and tug at the back of Kylo’s neck, gently forcing his head down so you can rest your forehead against his. “Oh Kylo,” you murmur with a small smile on your lips. “I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy.”

Kylo flashes you a true smile, a smile that reaches his eyes and showcases his marvelous dimples, a rare smile that even you don’t get to see too often. Kylo picks you up, letting your legs wrap around his waist as he carries you back to the bed as he covers your shoulders and collarbones in a spattering of kisses. While the streets below you were hustling and bustling with the mid-morning New York traffic, there in your 50th-floor penthouse, everything was calm and quiet. The only sounds that would come from the penthouse were the soft moans and whispers of love and adoration, promises and confessions that would last a lifetime. Talking could wait just a little while longer.

—–

The winding path to your family estate seemed longer than normal, the gravel path seemingly not having an end. You sit in the back seat, staring mindlessly out of the car window as Charles drives you closer and closer to your parents.

The ominous pattering of the rain clouded your mood. It was like the weather was tormenting you, a foreboding omen that follows you from Kylo’s apartment to your family estate.

The sound of Charles calling your name repeatedly breaks you from the trance you hadn’t realized you entered. “Sorry,” you mutter to the driver, before thanking him and paying his way. “You can take the rest of the day off, Charles. I’ll get Kylo if I need anything.”

A short goodbye was shared between the two of you as your turn to face your fate. You share at the large black doors in front of you, taunting you with their imposing size. They know what lurks behind the door, they’ll know what will happen.

You use your key to let yourself in, pushing the heavy wooden mass as you finally face your impending doom.

You had tried to be optimistic, tried to think that your parents will understand why you did what you did and why you’ve been doing what you’ve been doing. But the niggling presence in the back of your mind keeps reminding you otherwise.

Your father, while at least somewhat a fan of Kylo’s, your mother despises him with every fibre of her being. After everything that has happened, you can’t exactly blame her.

You call out to your parents from the foyer, your voice bouncing off the white marble floor that decorated the foyer.

You carry yourself through the house, your heels clicking along the floor. You realise you’d practically dressed like Kylo, black tapered trousers, black shirt and black blazer, paired with your black patent heels. It was like you were dressed for a funeral, and in some ways, you were. Walking towards the drawing-room, the most logical place your parents could be, you push open the door, smiling sheepishly when your parents faces come into view. “Hi,” you meekly say.

You feel like a scolded school-child, and you haven’t even told them anything. “Sorry for barging in, but I really need to talk to you two.”

The small smiles that your parents had been wearing visibly drop and worry began to fill their eyes.

You rush to sit on the sofa opposite them, wanting to get this over and done with. “I need you two to promise me that you’ll listen to me, and not say anything until I’m done. Can you promise me that?”

Your parents share a dubious look before your dad nods his head ever so slightly. You let out the small breath you’d been holding, your shoulders slumping ever so slightly. “Things have…progressed over the last few days, mostly with my engagement to Oliver,” you begin to say, trying to find the right words. “I just want to say that I appreciate everything the two of you did for me last year, I’ll always be grateful for that. But I wasn’t happy, I never was. The only time I was happy was when I was here, in New York. With Kylo.”

You should see your parents stiffen, already in the defence at just the mere mention of his name. Your mum goes to open her mouth to say something but you stop her. “Please, you promised you’d let me speak,” you beg. You wring your hands in your lap, twirling your fingers around one another. “Kylo and I understand one another, we rely on each other. We’ve been through so much that only we can understand it.” You pause for a minute, trying to figure out if you should say what you were thinking. In the end, you do. “We love each other.”

“For God’s sake!” Your mother exclaims, all but jumping from her seat as she leers down at you.

“Mum…listen…”

“No you listen!” she screeches, pointing her spindly finger at you. “How much pain and destruction have you caused this family?! Because of _him_?!”

“You don’t _get_ it do you? You _never_ have!” you yell back. “I can’t tell you anything, without you screaming at me.”

“I wonder why! All you do is lie!”

“You want the truth? You really want to know everything? Fine.” you practically spit at your mum as you rise to your feet, standing toe to toe with her. “Kylo and I have been having an affair, ever since we came back here. Rey found out, sent Oliver to try and kill me, and guess what? He almost did.”

Your parents remain silent, your mother silently simmering away and your dad watching you in stunned silence.

“I ran to Kylo’s and he took care of me, kept me safe. He’s the first person I thought of when I thought I was going to die. He brought me back to his place, stitched up my arm just like I had stitched him up all those years ago. We made a plan to hurt Oliver, to kill him. Kylo was never going to let him live after what he did to me. Kylo tortured him and we both shot Oliver point-blank through the skull.”

You could feel your mother and father both bubbling away with anger. But nonetheless, you continued to tell them the full story. “There were some photos sent to him, an…interaction Kylo and I had a few weeks ago. Turns out Rey had taken the photos, and planned to kill me with Oliver. When he told us about Rey’s involvement, Kylo ended his engagement to her. And if she wanted to kill me because I was just sleeping with Kylo, god only knows what she’s planning now that he’s broken up with her to be with me.”

The silence was deafening and for a second, everything was still. You don’t even feel the slap as your mum’s hand collides with your cheek, but you feel the impact as your head whips to the side. You bring your hand to your burning cheek, the warmth radiating out of it.

“I can’t even look at you!” she cries as she storms out of the room, slamming shut every single door in her path.

Tears prick your eyes as you sink back into your seat on the large sofa, your elbows resting on your knees as you tug the roots of your hair in frustration. You feel the sofa dip from your Dad’s weight as he sidles up beside you.

“Talk to me,” he tells you softly as he lets his hand pat your shoulder, rubbing ever so slightly.

“I think I told you everything,” you mumble, trying to hold back the tears.

“No, don’t talk to me like I’m a schmcuk who doesn’t understand what you’re going through.”

His New Jersey accent is thick now, and you can’t help but chuckle softly, the first chuckle you’ve managed to pass through your lips in a while. “I love him, Daddy,” you confess, staring at your father with wet eyes. “I always have, and I think I always will.”

You see his fists clench tightly, and your heart sinks, but you continue with your confession. “I’m finally happy. For the first time in a year, I’m happy again.”

“So ya said,” he huffs out. He pinches his eyes with his finger and thumb, rubbing them as he sighs. “I thought you were happy,” he mutters softly as he runs a hand through his hair. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

You sigh heavily, letting your shoulders and body slump in on itself. “I don’t know,” you tell him. “Maybe because I knew what Mum would say, maybe because I didn’t think you two would understand. I don’t think I’m too far off the mark…” You sigh heavily once more, taking a breather to gather your thoughts. “And maybe, deep down, I was trying to kid myself into thinking that I could be happy without Kylo in my life. But seeing him again, even after everything that happened, I knew I still loved him. And I knew he was my happiness.”

You dad sits beside you silently, not uttering a single word for a moment too long. Suddenly, his arm that had had a clenched fist attached to it, wound around your shoulder, tugging your body close to his. “If ya happy, I ain’t gonna stop ya from being with him.”

Your head shoots up from his shoulder, looking up at him with wide eyes. “Do you mean that?”

“Course I do,” he tells you as he kisses the top of your head. “And I can tell ya from experience, if a man is willing to kill anyone for hurting his girl, I ain’t gonna stand in the way. And don’t worry about your ma, I’ll talk to her.”

You let the tears fall from your eyes as you throw your arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly. “Thank you!” you cry into his shoulder as you cling onto him for dear life.

Your fathers hand runs up and down your back, soothing your tears. You feel as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders as your fathers hands smooths you, practically cradling you like he had done when you were a child.

“Don’t worry, doll. We’ll sort this all out.”

—————

Not far away, Kylo sat in his parents drawing room, his foot tapping against the polished floor while he waited for his mother to finish making tea. Han sat opposite him, taking in his son’s appearance. He knew his son well enough to know there was something plaguing his mind.

Leia walks in, tea tray in hand and Kylo all but jumps as the door swings open, too lost in his own thoughts to be paying attention.

Leia notices her son practically jumping out of his skin but she says nothing as she places the tray down on the coffee table. She sits beside Han and waits for Kylo to speak.

Kylo doesn’t know how to start. How do you explain everything that’s been happening to his parents? They’d done so much for him already, so much to make everyone else see that he had changed. That he was no longer the boy who believe in Snoke and allowed him to manipulate him. They tried to show everyone he was loyal, and he was throwing it all back in their face.

“I don’t think there’s an easy way to say this,” Kylo finally mutters out as he rubs his hands together. His eyes are downcast, not wanting to see the eventual look on his parents faces.

“Somethings happened, and I’ve taken care of it. But then something else happened after that, and I have to tell you about it now.”

Han and Leia remain quiet, just looking at their son as he debates internally with himself. Leia takes hold of Han’s hand and squeezes, trying to calm herself.

“I’ve been with someone else,” Kylo finally says. He says your name, finally looking at his parents. “I’ve been having an affair with her ever since she came back. I didn’t mean for anyone to die, but Oliver hurt her and I couldn’t let him live. And then Rey, fuckin’ Rey was so cruel to her when she was injured that I saw red and threw her out, ended the engagement there and then.”

He takes a breath, trying to quickly gather his thoughts. “I don’t want to marry Rey, I’m sorry but I won’t do it. I love…” he takes another breath before saying your name, “I love her. She’s the one I want to be with.”

Kylo finally breaths out, an invisible weight lifted from his shoulders. The silence is palpable. It’s so quiet, it’s practically deafening.

Just as Kylo waits for the imminent backlash, a small chuckle begins to fill the room. Kylo looks up, seeing his father’s shoulders shaking with laughter.

“Hand it over, toots,” Han laughs as he holds out his hand to Leia, the infamous Solo smirk plastered to his face.

Kylo’s brows furrow in confusion as he looks between his parents, wondering why they’re not yelling or screaming at him. Leia sighs heavily as she glares at Han. “Not now,” she hisses.

“I’m sorry,” Kylo interrupts, “what’s happening?”

Han and Leia look back at their son, smiling sheepishly. “Well, we just had a bet to see how long it would take you to admit you were having an affair,” Han admits with a carefree shrug.

“You knew?!”

“You weren’t exactly subtle, honey,” Leia tells her son as she sits down beside him, taking his large hand in her small one. “Han saw the two of you go into his office on her first night back.”

“I made sure that desk was deep cleaned before I used it again,” Han grumbles as he sips his scotch.

Kylo stares in disbelief at his parents. The whole time, they both knew. “If you knew, then why did you force me to marry Rey?”

He should be angry, should be furious. He should be tearing through the drawing room. But what holds him back is the fact his parents accept what’s happened. He no longer has to live a lie.

“Your mother wanted to see if you would tell us then about your affair if she pushed the marriage forward.”

“Han!”

“He was honest with us, so we can be honest with him,” Han says. Kylo’s still in shock, unable to know what he really feels. “We never would have let you go through with it. We would have found a reason to call it off it you hadn’t told us,” he tells his son sincerely.

For the first time in a long time, Kylo believes his parents. He lets out a long sigh, his shoulders slumping as he buries his face in his hands. He feels his mother’s small hand rubbing his shoulders, a happy comfort.

“Now tell us, what happened with Oliver?” Leia asks softly.

And so he tells them, leaves no stone left unturned as he retells the story he’s been playing over and over again in his head. He tells them everything, about Rey finding out and using Oliver to get rid of you. How Oliver hurt you and how he just couldn’t let him get away with that. He told them about how the Knights disposed of his body, and that no one will ever find him. He also tells them about how Rey could be planning a revenge attack.

“Rey wants her out of the picture,” Kylo says as he slumps back against the sofa. “And I don’t think she’ll stop now.”

Leia asks whether you would be safe, whether you need to be protected. Kylo shakes his head. “She moved into her old apartment below me, but I’ll have her move into my apartment as soon as possible. I’m not letting her out of my sight until Rey’s been dealt with.”

Han leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he does. “We’ll be here, for both of you. We’ll do whatever you need us to do, son.”

Kylo moves his gaze to look his father in the eye. For so long, his fathers eyes held concern and worry for his son, for what he would become. But now, Han’s eyes hold love and a fiery devotion for his son and the woman he loves.

Han clasps his son’s hand in his, squeezing tightly. “Whatever it takes.”

Kylo had never been more grateful. He smiles softly at his father, before turning back to his mother and smiling at her too.

“We need to speak to her parents too,” Kylo finally speaks. “She’s talking with them now, but we know how little her mother thinks of me.”

Leia scoffs and rolls her eyes. “You leave her to me.” She pats her son’s shoulder softly before standing tall, gesturing for her husband and son to follow suit. “Well, what are we all waiting for? An invitation?” Leia throws her arms in exasperation before confidently walking out of the drawing room.

Kylo and Han both share a look before following Leia, both of them hot on her heels. “The sooner we make arrangements, the safer everyone will be.”

Leia gets their driver to bring around the sleek black Rolls Royce, immediately sitting in the passengers’ side, leaving Han and Kylo to sit in the back.

Kylo immediately pulls out his phone, texting you to tell you of their impending arrival.

—————

From the comfort of your fathers arms, your phone pings. You jump slightly and pull away from him, grabbing your phone from your pocket. A small smile graces your face as you read the message. “It’s Kylo. He, Han and Leia are on their way over to speak to you and Mum,” you tell your father as you brush away the tears under your eyes.

You’d stopped crying a small while ago, but your father kept you close, holding you until you felt ready to leave his embrace.

“I’ll go and get your mother,” your father sighs, standing to his full height and leaving you to your own devices.

You wait by the large windows, waiting for that sleek black Rolls Royce to come into view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m finally, finally posting this chapter after my slump!
> 
> I’ve heard some good news about a job so I’m keeping my fingers crossed for the near future! Until then, I’m going to relax and indulge in the holiday I didn’t get while working. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has been so patient and thank you for 133 kudos! That's insane! Thank you for all your support and I hope you enjoyed reading!💖

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on Tumblr!
> 
> [History and Fandoms](https://historyandfandoms50.tumblr.com/)


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